


Lux et Veritas

by AliLamba



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Ambition, Bartenders, Developing Relationship, F/M, Female Friendship, Friendship, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:49:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 21,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27472273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AliLamba/pseuds/AliLamba
Summary: Relena wasn’t quite sure why her and Dorothy were friends.
Relationships: Relena Peacecraft/Heero Yuy
Comments: 20
Kudos: 31





	1. there is etiquette for this

**Author's Note:**

> Cookami prompt for the win. Kind of. It went slightly awry.

Relena wasn’t quite sure why her and Dorothy were friends.

Well, that wasn’t exactly true. She knew when it started: boarding school, or rather, primary school probably. Elite all-girls schools were secular enough, rarely did the class make-up change year to year, so there wasn’t much room for hmm _maybe not_. They’d been in most of the same classes year after year, their families had known each other, and Dorothy had helped Relena the first time she’d been properly drunk. She’d supplied the alcohol, but, she’d also helped after too. 

And she was – Dorothy was just sort of always there. She was in fact, probably Relena’s very best friend, should she ever stop to try and name one.

She was there when Relena’s father died.

But, Relena didn’t really think about it, it didn’t even come up really because they had a good enough clique of friends, until Relena decided to go to ESUN University and then suddenly Dorothy was going to ESUN University, and also had a new library named after daddy Catalonia. Which was fine, except they were suddenly suitemates too.

Relena had been more focused on school than anything else, but Dorothy helped her make sure that she occasionally had what went for the _college experience_ during their four years together. It had been a good four years. Honest, it had been.

When Relena declared that she was going to apply to stay on for grad school, Dorothy had decided that she would join her, that it was a very good idea. And even that was okay, because Dorothy helped them get really excellent housing.

But there really maybe should have been a limit.

“We’re going out.”

Relena looked up from her book, her finger already on the next page. She’d just done the brave thing of dropping her special minor in literature, and, she missed it.

“Sorry?”

Dorothy was already dressed up.

“ _Out_ , Miss Relena. It’s nearly mid-semester, and I’m worried about you. You haven't been on so much as a date in months.”

Relena felt the instinct to frown. For one, she sort of always hated it when Dorothy called her _Miss Relena_ , which, she assumed was some sort of pet name. For another, she didn’t really _want_ to go out. She’d got her weekend all planned out already, in the form of a very lovely stack of 19th century British novels.

“Oh, I don’t know,” Relena said, rubbing her fuzzy-socked feet together. “Didn’t I – I thought I met with one of your friends, once. Wasn’t that just a few weeks ago?”

“That was last _year_ ,” Dorothy moaned, sitting down on the other side of the couch. “Luna forgives you for never calling her back, by the way.”

Relena stared impassively back. Luna? Was that what her name was?

“I’m _serious_ , Miss Relena. It’s time. You need to go out.”

Relena checked the clock on the wall; it was barely after seven. She’d had dinner almost an hour ago. There was a piece of cheesecake in the fridge she was planning on working through tonight and tomorrow.

“Look, you have to go out. I already threw away the cheesecake.”

Relena put down her book. “I was saving that!”

“Carbs, Miss Relena! You have to watch your carbs. No one likes to see a fat Secretary of State.”

Relena groaned, reclining against the couch. In the _decade_ they’d known each other, Relena had learned the signs of when she was not likely to get her way. And the cheesecake was already gone, so. Relena sighed.

“Just for a few hours, okay. Honestly, I do have to study tomorrow.”

The grin Dorothy offered in return was very likely criminal.

The first stop was fine, really. Dorothy came from serious, serious money, and she very rarely had a weekend evening free. Tonight was no exception, some sort of cocktail event organized under the guise of charity, which was how Dorothy got Relena to put on a dress. A _dress_ , even.

“You look wonderful Miss Relena.”

Relena hummed her acknowledgment, wondering where the good snacks were kept.

“Come, let’s go get something to drink. There are people I want you to meet.” Dorothy hooked their arms. 

The thing was, Relena couldn’t deny that Dorothy had her best interests at heart. The Secretary of State jab, that was, well it was sort of a joke, but, she got the impression more often than not that Dorothy really _meant_ it. She’d been the one to really encourage Relena to pick political science as a major, and, she’d been right. Relena was doing well in her classes. And, well. Anyway.

“This is my friend, Quatre Raberba Winner.”

Relena held out her hand, using the other to take the glass of champagne Dorothy was sliding into it. She swanned off immediately after, leaving them alone. 

“Very nice to meet you, Mr. Winner.”

He smiled benignly back.

“Quatre’s fine. Relena, is it? I think our fathers knew each other.”

A sort of…cold, sinking feeling, settled into her gut, which she didn’t quite know what to do with. See? This was one of the reasons she didn’t like to go out. Ah. Yes, well.

“Ah. Yes, well.”

It was just a _surprise_ was all. She hated when it surprised her. 

“We were at the funeral, actually. But then,” he tried to laugh, making light of the situation. “You know quite a lot of people were at the funeral!” Horror flashed across his face, as if he suddenly realized what he’d said. “I’m – so sorry about that, by the way.”

He sounded as if he genuinely meant it, so she decided to let it go. She finished half her glass of champagne instead. “It was five years ago,” she assured him. “Thank you for remembering, though.”

“You’re right. I’m – I’m sorry. Look, what a terrible way to start things off. Please, let me get you another drink.”

Relena looked around the party, at the pale, bland faces of people who had just too much money.

“You know what, Quatre? That sounds lovely.”

They chatted on their way to the bar, Relena smiling in passing at the people she knew. Quatre was going to school abroad but had come back for the long weekend, for reasons he was vague about. His boyfriend Trowa would be meeting them later that night, after finishing his shift.

“ _Shift?_ I’m sorry. You – “ she had to stop herself.

“Yes,” Quatre drawled, putting his drink back down on the cocktail napkin. “I have a boyfriend who works at a restaurant.”

“A _restaurant?_ ”

“It’s not even particularly high-end. I’m pretty sure they do a happy hour.”

Relena fought the urge to _laugh._ “You know, I think I like him already.”

Quatre smiled sweetly. “I think I like him too.”

Relena smiled again, and, sipped from her drink.

“But, I have a feeling that Dorothy doesn’t know about him.”

Relena raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

“Yes,” he said, looking over the bar. “I’m sure I’m off the list, after this.”

Relena frowned. “I’m sorry, the what? The list?”

Quatre turned, propping his head on a fist with a smile. “I had a feeling you didn’t know.”

“Didn’t know what?”

His blue eyes were gleaming. “She has it in mind to set you up with someone soon.”

“Set me _up with_ —“ Relena balked, sitting up straight. “Is this a joke? Please tell me this is some kind of joke.”

Quatre’s grin flashed. At least if it was a joke it was a decent one.

“She’s been profiling people for weeks, now. Keeps talking about her wonderful friend. The list is mostly rumor, but, I bet she actually has one.”

The reality was starting to settle. “A list.”

“Mmhm. I’m pretty sure I’m number three.”

“Number _three?_ ”

“Well, I really can’t be sure. But based on the other people she’s been talking to – “

“Wait, I’m sorry, she had a _list?_ ”

Quatre paused to laugh. “You really didn’t know.” At Relena’s vaguely horrified expression, Quatre back-pedaled: “Well. I’m pretty sure. I suppose it is a bit circumspect, but. Wait. Should I,” Quatre paused, his drink halfway to his mouth. “I’m sorry, should I not have said anything?”

Relena was still processing it all. She wasn’t sure if she honestly _believed it_ , but, she supposed that this perfectly nice person would have no reason to lie. A list? Of, what, of potential _suitors_? Come on. Be reasonable.

But – but the cheesecake…the dress…

Relena shook her head.

“Well,” she decided. “If you’re number three, I suppose I could do a lot worse,” she said, and she clinked her glass against Quatre’s.

Dorothy came back after a few minutes with a lovely sort of gleam in her eye, which guttered, somewhat, when Quatre mentioned his boyfriend joining them later. 

Relena surveyed her friend, wondering if Quatre’s assertion was correct. They were stuck on more benign topics like gossip and the weather, and there was apparently an unspoken agreement between Relena and Quatre not to bring up the shared knowledge lest it start a scene. Relena was definitely anti-scene.

“Did Relena tell you she’s thinking about running for class representative? I think she’d be fabulous at it, don’t you?”

Quatre raised his glass a bit.

“Undoubtedly. I hope you run, Miss Relena.”

Relena fought to keep her smile diplomatic, and less of a…cringe. “Well,” she said. “I’m still undecided. I’m not really sure the merit of it.” The bartender had shown up with another cocktail, and she was considering whether she wanted to drink it.

“Oh,” Dorothy said, hooking her arm into Relena’s. “Quatre, excuse us. There’s someone else I want Relena to meet.”

Chang Wufei – she really hoped he wasn’t on the list. There was nothing wrong with him, per se, he was studying for his PhD in history, and she was sure he was very nice. But he seemed to have no interest in her, no interest in talking to them at all, and after a few minutes of forced and mostly one-sided conversation Relena finding Quatre’s gaze in the crowd and sending him distress signals.

“Miss Relena!” Quatre called out, descending on them. Relena only caught Dorothy’s displeased frown from the corner of her eye.

“Oh, Quatre! Have you met Chang Wufei? He’s also studying at the graduate level here.”

“No, I haven’t had the pleasure. Chang, did you say your name was? Any relation to the Liaoning Chang family?”

Mr. Chang was silent for a while, his lip curling. “Yes,” he answered, and that was sort of that.

Quatre and Relena shared a look.

“Well, I’m not sure if you or Miss Catalonia have any plans, but I’d love if you’d like to accompany me if you have the time; I was just on my way out.”

Relena immediately jumped ship. “I don’t think we have plans. And that’s so lovely of you to invite me. Do we have plans Dorothy? I wasn’t aware we had any plans.”

The coldness of Dorothy’s gaze did nothing for her smile.

“No, we’d love to join you.”

“Oh—“ Quatre stilled, reaching for Relena’s hand. “Right, well, of course, plenty of room for both of you.”

In the end, Wufei came too, for not a single good reason Relena could suss out.

“I have to warn you, this isn’t probably what you were expecting,” Quatre was saying, with a forced sort of smile, staring out the car window at the passing buildings.

Dorothy still had her cool mask of indifference on. “I’m sure it’s fine.”

“Yes, well. Trowa’s been saying it’s the most popular in town at the moment. He goes pretty regularly, or so I’ve been told.”

Wufei was still silent. Dorothy tried to catch her eye, but Relena avoided it. She still wasn’t sure how she felt about – well.

“Here we are.”

Relena was sure there was a _dodgy part of town_ everywhere, and, she was glad that they’d finally found this one. Dorothy was much less tactful in showing her disdain as they all got out of the car.

“Are you sure this is right?” she asked, lip curled in a sneer the streetlights definitely caught.

Quatre offered a mild laugh, checking his phone.

“The Horny Badger, just as I was told…”

“The Horny – “ Dorothy pulled a face. “I’m sorry, the horny _what?_ ”

“Let’s just, go inside,” Relena said, ushering them away from the cab.

It was loud already, and there was a bouncer at the door, checking IDs, which was awkward for people unused to having to take out their wallets. He had a long braid down the back of his jacket that Relena definitely envied. 

“Have a nice time ladies,” he said with a wink, and everyone went inside.

It was even louder in there. 

No one could tell where the music was coming from, at first. It seemed like the answer was: _everywhere_. Relena looked to the far end of the interior, past the massive bar, several pool tables, clusters of chairs for sitting. There was a wall of board games, plenty of people laughing around a – was that a _popcorn_ machine? – and in the distance, a line of alleys for playing darts. 

Relena didn’t know where to start. 

“Let’s get drinks?” she suggested, and everyone moved toward the bar. 

The bar happened to be where Trowa was, and after Quatre’s giddy reunification with his boyfriend, introductions were made all around. Relena caught Dorothy staring at a ketchup stain, on his shirt.

“It’s fine,” Relena assured her friend, waiting to be served. She had at least two cocktails in her already, way more than usual, and she felt like it was showing. “Just another drink and we’ll go.”

Dorothy looked away, her chin in the air. “If you say so…” she drawled.

Relena turned to the bar, which was precisely when the bartender came up to meet her. 

She expected it worked in his favor, in this sort of establishment, to be more surly than anything. He certainly didn’t seem to be loving his job. But she was sure friendliness didn’t exactly put a dent in his tip count; he was handsome as hell. 

“We’re out of grapefruit,” he started with, and Relena found herself blinking. 

“They’re out of grapefruit,” she reported to the group, for no good reason. He was just handsome, honestly. It was throwing her a little.

The bartender didn’t look very patient.

“Right, I think, maybe we’ll get beer? Everyone okay with a pitcher?” Relena cast her gaze around the group, didn’t find anyone objecting. 

“Which kind.”

“Oh. The. The beer kind? What do you have?”

Trowa leaned away from his boyfriend.

“Just give us the new red on tap, Heero.”

 _Heero_ nodded when he saw him. “Hey Trowa,” he said, like that was all that was needed to be said, and then he turned away to go get the beer. Relena turned back around. 

Dorothy was frowning at Heero’s back.

She tried not to watch him while he poured. Honestly, he was probably bothered by a lot by patrons, she didn’t want to be annoying or overly fawning. But he was well-muscled, just slightly taller than her, had this dark thick hair she just sort of wanted to _grab—_

“D’you want to start a tab?” he asked, when he got back.

“Um,” Relena said, licking her lips. “Yes.”

They went to one of the empty lounge booths by the board games (it was still early and no one was drunk enough for self-serve popcorn yet) so they could drink and get acquainted. Trowa had grown up local and moved away for college, which was where he met Quatre; he’d only moved back to help the family restaurant after his parents got sick. His sister was taking over most of the work. 

Even Dorothy was loosening up, somewhat, as the beer started to finally disappear. She honestly started to have some repartee, especially with Wufei, because Dorothy wasn’t shy about explaining to him that his degree was mostly worthless and Wufei was getting more annoyed by the minute.

Relena’s gaze kept darting back toward the bar, and she probably drank too much.

“I’ll get us a fresh one,” she offered, when it was finally nearing the bottom.

She walked to the bar with it, taking up a spot near Heero’s section, prepared to very patiently wait her turn. 

“Hey! What’re you having.”

It was the guy from earlier, the braided guy, and he had just popped out from nowhere. Well definitely not _nowhere_ , it’s just, Relena definitely wasn’t paying attention to him. 

“Another pitcher?” she asked, holding up the mostly empty one, fighting feelings of disappointment and ridiculousness.

“Sure thing,” he said, winking again. “What’s yer pleasure.”

 _The hotter bartender_ , she wanted to say, but she refrained. “Um,” she said instead. “No clue! Dealer’s choice.”

“Nice I like it,” he said, and he took the empty plastic jug back with him. 

Relena hovered, then, glancing back at her friends, or, the people she’d come in with, rather, because friends certainly felt like a bit of a stretch considering the newness of it all. She still wasn’t sure if Wufei had spoken more than seven sentences; she wondered if he was honestly having a nice time.

“What do you want,” a gruff voice asked her, and Relena turned around with surprise.

It was the hotter bartender – _Heero_ – and he was wiping down his hands. There was an awkward moment where she didn’t quite know what to say, where her mouth and mind were working in discord.

“Ah! Already sorted,” she admitted, not really wanting to lie. “The other guy is getting us more beer.” The bartender looked over his shoulder, where the braided one was messing with the taps. He frowned.

“What did you ask for?” he said, which surprised her again.

“Uh,” she wet her lips again. “Dealer’s…choice? I don’t think you’re dealing with a very particular crowd with us.”

Heero the bartender frowned, a bit. And then before she’d managed to say anything else, the hot bartender was stalking off towards the other bartender (arguably also very handsome, it was maybe a requirement of the job or at the very least a definitive plus), and they were having some sort of conversation, in which the braided guy glanced at Relena more than once, where he appeared to whine more than once to his coworker, and then ultimately, when he relinquished the jug so that Heero could fill it with something else.

Relena knew her brows were slightly raised when he came back.

“Just – add it to my tab?” she asked, feeling a bit helpless.

“Yeah,” he answered, arms braced on the bar. “Relena, right?”

She nodded, and in something of a light daze, she brought the pitcher back to her friends.

She spent some time trying to appreciate the beer. Honestly, she did, because she was sure it was good. Trowa had nothing to say about it (gosh was a taciturn group) but he drank it, steadily, and when Quatre asked what it was Relena had to admit she had no idea, and then Trowa was telling them what it was and opening up a bit about his moderate knowledge of beer, which had Quatre beaming, and then Quatre was asking if anyone wanted to play Connect-4, and that was when things took a turn for more fun.

Relena had a warm sort of feeling in her belly throughout, for no good reason. Honestly, she had no aspirations, was very content with the idea of going home alone. But, per Dorothy, it _had_ been months, and…he had remembered her name.

“Anyone want some water?” she asked, when Dorothy was seething after losing quite quickly to a smug-looking Wufei.

“No,” Dorothy quipped. “And I want to move on to darts.”

“Fine by me,” Quatre said, and he stood, still holding on to one of Trowa’s hands.

“I’ll get us some water,” Relena announced. “Meet you there in a few.”

No one paid her any attention, which was fine, as Relena moved through the growing crowd. This place _was_ apparently very popular. Another bartender had shown up on the other side: pretty, young, with short blue-black hair. She was doing a great job interacting with the people showing up to drink, as was the guy with the long braid, who was laughing at something someone was telling him. Relena moved past them, side-stepped people until she was…well, being way too obvious, probably.

She took up a perch and waited.

The braided guy knew to avoid her now, which was, well, maybe she was imagining it, but Heero the hot bartender made eye contact with her pretty quickly, nodding in a way that let her know he’d be down soon. She picked up a thick paper coaster while she waited, running her fingers along the worn, soft edges.

“What do you need,” he asked, and Relena’s stomach flipped. Uh-oh.

“Just water,” she admitted, and Heero nodded, stepping away. He grabbed a glass, added ice, used the soda jet to fill it.

“Your friends need anything?”

Relena shook her head, holding on to the glass with a loose grasp. “Don’t think so. The beer was good, by the way. I forgot to ask what it was, but, Trowa knew.”

Heero the hot bartender nodded. Okay. She should stop calling him that. “Do you work here often?” she found herself asking, blindly, on instinct. It’s just – he wasn’t moving _away_ , exactly.

“No,” he answered. “Once a week, maybe. Sometimes twice. Duo was short tonight.”

“Duo?”

Heero jerked his head at the guy with the braid. “It’s his place, more or less. Wasn’t his money but he’s the only one keeping it afloat.”

Relena nodded. “Well, he’s clearly doing a fabulous job.”

It was the wrong thing to say, only because, there were only platitudes to say after, and, Relena didn’t have any more excuses to stay, and they both ran out sort of quickly. So she went back to her friends, who were busy playing darts, and poured herself a rather large glass from the remaining beer in the pitcher, and drank it far too quickly.

Duo clearly _was_ doing a good job, because, they were all having a nice time. Honestly, as they continued to play darts (Relena was particularly bad at it), she found herself _laughing_ , and _dancing_ , even, whenever she’d done something to impress herself. Dorothy’s reservations apparently evaporated on seeing Relena’s good mood, and they seemed to settle in for good. 

_The Horny Badger_ : five stars, would come again.

“More, water,” Relena chanted, when they’d made it to the end of the pitcher. “And – drinks? I can get drinks.” She took some mental orders; Dorothy would have gone with her except she was about to start throwing darts against Wufei again.

“Be right back,” Relena promised, with far too much glee.

Okay the Duo guy was definitely avoiding her.

Heero was filling someone else’s apparently large order, so Relena pretended to squint at the tap list, just a regular, totally indecisive customer, while Duo and the girl bartender wandered past her to help other patrons. And she was just beginning to decide she was being _absolutely ridiculous_ , and was definitely _moderately drunk_ and to just order the drinks already, when Heero started walking down the back of the bar to her.

“More water?” he asked her, and Relena’s skin warmed.

“Yeah, and, I think we need” (she paused to count, she had to concentrate) “three whiskey gingers. And one vodka soda? I was told they were called whiskey gingers and to ask for it just like that.”

Heero smirked. “Got it,” he said, and he went to go tend bar.

Relena sighed and sat on a stool, bringing up her foot to rest on the bottom rung.

She looked around again, her stomach golden and warm, trying not to look at Heero while he worked. He was wearing dark jeans and a basic white t-shirt, slim fitting, but he’d rolled up the sleeves a little, and she couldn’t think of a very practical reason to do it except that it really showed off his arms. Whatever his day job, it apparently involved manual labor. Like, a _lot_ of it.

Jackhammer operator.

“Which one’s yours,” he asked, putting them down in front of her, and Relena stared down at the drinks.

“Um,” she said, seeing the light amber liquid in glasses. Her mind was foggy, but, she knew she’d have to make two trips. “That one.” She pointed to one of the ginger ale drinks. “Be right back? Don’t let anyone spike it. I’m no good when I’m roofied,” she said, and Heero laughed under his breath as she went to deliver the rest.

Dorothy was still aiming her darts at the wall when she returned, Quatre was half in Trowa’s lap, and Wufei was staring so intently at the bullseye that no one really minded when she dropped them off and then went directly back to the bar.

Heero was still hovering close when she returned, cleaning glasses. She was pretty sure he was ignoring his duties, but she wasn’t _ever_ going to complain.

“Should be fine,” he said when he saw her, and a grin splashed across her face.

“My hero,” she cooed, only mildly joking and definitely drunk, and she took the barstool again.

Heero grinned again. He licked his lower lip, then, picked up a cocktail straw. He dipped it into her drink, put his finger on the end to trap some liquid inside, then let the sample drop on one of the paper coasters littering the bar. Her eyes lit up when she realized it was one of those GHB testing ones, and was glad to see plenty more all along the length of the counter. There was no change to the small printed testing circle besides some darkening as it got wet.

“You’re good,” he assured her, and then he dropped a maraschino cherry into her cocktail.

Relena laughed with delight. “Add it to my tab,” she joked, and the picked it up to take a sip.

She didn’t…she didn’t move away, was the thing. Feeling good and forgotten for awhile, Relena held her perch at the bar, and probably would have left after a single minute except Heero kept coming back to her. He’d stop to go take care of someone’s drink, to do _his job,_ really – but as soon as he finished ringing them up, he’d come back to her, so over the course of twenty-plus minutes they actually had a vaguely decent conversation.

“You live around here?” he asked her, and Relena smiled.

“Yup, kind of,” she said, nodding. “I live on campus. ESUN.”

“Ah.”

“Ah?”

He put down the glass he was cleaning. “Please tell me we’re not about to get busted for serving underage.”

Relena _laughed_. “No, although, I guess I’m supposed to say – thank you? No, I’m in grad school there. Political science.”

Heero tilted his head, frowning a bit. “First year?”

Relena nodded.

Heero nodded. “Hm. I’m in second.”

Relena…paused, at that. “I’m sorry. What?”

Heero blew out a breath, leaning back with hands on the bar. He’d been leaning forward to hear her.

“I’m in the second year of that program.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I’m not.”

“No, but, I’ve never seen you.”

“You have Professor G?”

Relena was staring at him with a dubious gaze. How drunk _was_ she? “Yeah…”

“Have you taken the exam on East African dictatorships?”

“Next week, why.”

Heero snorted. “You’ll see.”

Relena…she felt herself smile.

When Duo made his third pass _awfully close_ to Heero’s back, he glared, and said he had to get back to work. His gaze, however…seemed to hover, for a moment, maybe half a second too long. Relena hoped she wasn’t making it up, but she’d already decided she was going to be dying on this hill tonight, probably.

She went back to her friends with some reluctance.

“The bartender goes to our school,” she explained, taking a seat. She was still on that level of drunkenness where she felt absolutely impervious.

Dorothy’s head turned up, sharp. “Oh?”

“Yeah, same program even. He’s a year ahead.”

Dorothy was squinting. “What’s his name again?”

“Heero,” Trowa interjected. And then he added: “He’s nice.”

“Hm.” Dorothy was still staring in his general direction. Relena took another sip of her drink. She hadn’t touched the cherry, yet. Was probably saving it until the end. She turned and found Dorothy staring at it.

“Come on,” Relena said. “It’s my first night off in weeks. I want to play some darts.”

She was still so spectacularly bad at it, which she found infinitely amusing. The one time she actually hit the board she practically screamed, though, which made her new friends mostly laugh at her expense. Whatever. At least it wasn’t _pity,_ and she wasn’t trying to be coy. It was _fun_ , and the more she played, the more she participated, the more Dorothy seemed to relax again. 

Wufei got the next round of drinks, which made Relena recognize just how much…she’d had to drink, actually, over the course of the evening. Huh. Usually Dorothy did a better job of letting her know when she’d had too much, and, considering the warm, fuzzy sensation coating the inside of her stomach, she’d probably definitely been overserved. Oh well.

A part of her was surprised they were still there, honestly, tempered only by surprise at Dorothy’s tolerance of Wufei, who made a rather strange addition to their troupe. His cheeks were just the slightest shade of pink, now, and he was much more talkative.

“You’re holding it all wrong,” he said, waspish, as Relena squinted one eye at the board. “It’s starting to get sad.”

Relena fought the urge to stick her tongue out at him. Failed. Whoops. She was probably very drunk.

“I know what I’m doing, okay,” she said, and when she lobbed the dart at the board, it fell to the ground before getting even halfway to the target. Relena pouted. “Boo.”

“Relena is a physical learner,” Dorothy asserted, standing gracefully. She did everything, even banal movement, with a flourish. “Let me.”

She picked up the next dart, then helped Relena find a position, pushing her feet apart with her own. She curled around Relena’s body, and helped her find a hold on the dart she put in her fingers.

“See Miss Relena? Easy. Visualize the target, and throw. Your stance is key.”

Dorothy stepped back, and Relena put her tongue between her teeth as she focused. Visualize the target. _Visualize the_ —quit thinking about Heero. She grinned. Relena threw the dart, and it banged off the cork surface without finding purchase.

Quatre and Trowa made consoling noises.

“No no, I will concede defeat. It is good to know one’s limitations,” she said, holding up her hands. “I shall not enter any darts tournaments any time soon.”

She couldn’t help the grin. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to get some consolation popcorn.”

Relena visited the ladies’ room, then skipped the popcorn machine, and headed back to the bar.

Heero grinned when he saw her.

Relena slid into the booth with rather more force than she intended. Dorothy had to pick up her drink so it wouldn’t spill.

“Okay, you’re on your own the rest of the night,” Relena said, unable to stop smiling, reaching past her friend to grab a glass of water. She started to drink heartily. Whose glass was this? Didn’t matter. It was full and cold. She wanted to be more sober for this.

Dorothy turned to her, raising a brow. Relena licked her lips.

“Bartender?” Dorothy asked.

Relena could not at all smother the grin. “Yeah. You think it’s a bad idea?”

Dorothy seemed to think for a beat too long, but Relena was too tipsy to fully process it. “No. It would be good for you, I think.”

Relena nodded. “I think we’re going to go back to his place.”

“No,” Dorothy said, looking away. “Come to ours.”

Relena’s brows raised. “You’re sure you wouldn’t mind?”

Dorothy was looking past Relena’s shoulder, so Relena turned to see. Heero was talking to the other bartender, the one with the braid. _Duo?_ Whatever. He was tying up his own loose ends, and the thought alone made Relena’s stomach warm.

“No, it’s fine. I’ll call us a cab.”

Relena turned back around, eyes gleaming. “Heero has a _motorcycle.”_ Dorothy looked down her nose at her drink.

“We should get a cab. Or I’m sure I could get my driver here soon enough.”

Relena knew she was drunk, or something, because she was disagreeing with her friend. “It’ll be fine, Dorothy! Seriously. We’ll beat you home,” she said, with a wink. She almost added: _don’t rush back_ , but, that would have been unforgivably crude. She leaned forward and kissed Dorothy on the cheek, a fond farewell. She grinned at the rest of the group, then grabbed her coat from the back of a chair.

Relena put it on as she walked, fluffing her hair out of the neck of it, heading right to where Heero was getting to the end of the bar.

Gosh he was just so handsome.

Heero saw her, jerked his head in the direction of a hallway. She went to it, and Heero met her there, sliding an arm around her torso.

She _definitely_ noticed the shiver that raced down her skin. Relena was suddenly very glad for the coat.

“So?” she asked, as they walked to the bar’s backdoor, passing crates full of whatever. “What do _you_ think was wrong with my darts game?”

Heero grinned, opening the back door to the chill of the outside air.

“It was your _release_ ,” he said, and Relena’s stomach twisted deliciously.


	2. i'm not sure if a curtsy is an age-appropriate choice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for my folx/ladies/whatnot on the internet. I had plans for NaNoWriMo that were not this lol

Relena stretched in her own bed, the next morning, a satisfied ache to her bones. Hmm. The grin spread of its own accord. She glanced at her bedside table, found the half-full glass of water from the night before and a torn-open condom wrapper. She nearly laughed at herself. Relena Darlian: _wonton sexual deviant_. She was honestly a bit proud.

Relena checked the floor beside her bed, found Heero’s shirt still on the ground. The grin intensified, a flash of excitement. He was still there, then. She got dressed quickly, pajama shorts that showed off her legs, sweater because it was justifiably cold.

She opened the door to her bedroom, saw the bathroom door open and the room inside dark, and walked down the short hallway to the living space.

To her immense delight and surprise, she found Dorothy and Heero in her kitchenette, having some sort of murmured conversation.

“Morning,” she said, when she saw them. They turned to look in tandem. “Any coffee left?”

Heero was watching her, staring at her, drinking her in, and Relena was barely processing his attention, so Dorothy was the first to speak. “We made plenty. Mugs are to the left of the sink.”

This was clearly a direction at Heero, who was standing closer, and he obviously heard her because he fetched a mug beautifully. Relena settled at the kitchen counter, fighting to keep her smile in check. Failing miserably.

“Thank you,” she said, when Heero placed a full mug in front of her.

Dorothy put the milk down on the counter as well. Relena mindlessly added some to her coffee.

“Big plans today?” she asked him, and Heero shrugged. There was a nice gleam to his eyes.

“Studying.”

“You don’t have to work tonight?”

Okay there was _definitely_ a gleam in his eyes.

“Nope.”

Relena’s lips felt dry. 

She licked them.

Her hands tightened on her coffee mug.

“Oh gosh. You know what?” Dorothy turned to look, too. “I think I forgot my, my hair tie, in my room. Heero, you want to…help me look with it? For it? You want to help me – look for it?”

She was sure that, if she could see Dorothy at all, her friend would be _rolling her eyes into oblivion_. But because Relena only had eyes for Heero, she could pretend she was making a wonderful amount of sense.

“Yeah,” Heero answered, with a small smile, and fire licked in her belly.

They were both grinning like idiots all the way to her room.

And it wasn’t until later that she realized she’d totally left her coffee behind.

See, she just couldn’t pinpoint what it _was_ about him. He wasn’t particularly dark and dangerous, once you got past the superficial stuff (bartender, motorcycle, interest in strength training). He was studying political science mostly out of curiosity and because he got a scholarship, but wasn’t exactly sure how much he wanted to participate in the political process. He was much more into data analytics.

For some reason, though, it was just _easy._ Saturday morning turned into Saturday _evening_ , Saturday evening into Sunday afternoon. They spread out in Relena’s bedroom and studied, making time only to go to the dining hall for take-out. And to make-out.

It was strange, but, it just sort of…worked.

It was mid-week before she realized it was a bit of a _thing._

“Relena?”

Relena looked up from her phone, the aftereffects of Heero’s texts not yet diminished, though her smile was fading fast. What was she doing? Oh. Right. Wednesday night study group. She was – oh boy – she was supposed to be helping to lead it.

“I’m so sorry. Where were we?”

Marjorie was chewing on her pen again. “We were talking about Idi Aman.”

Relena nodded, trying to school her features. “Right. Yes. Aman.” Goodness this might be a problem. She and Heero had made a point of swearing off contact until the coming weekend, but it looked like they’d have to set limits on _texting_ as well.

She tried to put herself back in the present.

 _Nope_ , no, she was still lost.

Her cheek twitching, Relena glanced at Dorothy, who appeared to take pity on her. Dorothy huffed a breath. “We were just getting to the part where he organized a coup, rather than stand trial for misappropriating military funds.”

“Right,” Relena said, and her gaze finally settling on her notes. This was not the opportune moment to laugh at herself. “Right. Professor G definitely made a point to stress the failings of the state.”

Relena and Dorothy walked back to their apartment in mostly silence.

“Everything okay?” she asked, and Relena stopped humming.

“Mm? Oh. Yes. Sorry about earlier, by the way. I’m a bit surprised by how easily distracted I’ve been.”

Because it was dark, she missed the rise of Dorothy’s eyebrows, but she did not entirely miss the strained silence.

Relena wet her lips. “You don’t think. This isn’t – this isn’t a _problem_ , right? Everything’s okay.”

Dorothy took another few steps forward. “Probably. Have you thought any more about class representative?”

Relena’s stomach sank, a little.

“No,” she admitted, walking under a street lamp. “Not really.”

It was a few weeks before she realized that it was _really going to be a problem_.

Part of it she wanted to say wasn’t her fault. Heero was certainly helpful to have around, and he was a very compatible study buddy. But she’d started to miss things: a planned meal with Dorothy, a mutual friend’s birthday. An assigned reading. Then two. It had been awhile since she was in the thrall of a new relationship, and it was...addicting. Completely.

And he was so _hot_ , so. Attractive, and smart, and nice, and sometimes he honest to god made her laugh. 

Things were just...they were _good_. 

She was sprawled on the couch in the living room one Thursday night, watching some movie because she loved it and Heero admitted that he’d never seen it, and she wanted to make sure it was living up to her memories before giving the official recommendation.

Dorothy came striding through the front door.

Relena gave her a smile when she saw her, which, Dorothy did not return.

Wait. What?

Relena struggled to sit up, then, watching as her friend stalked down the hall to her own bedroom.

Hold on. Was Dorothy…mad at her?

Relena’s brow pitched. Should she follow her? She couldn’t remember the last time Dorothy was…was _mad_ . Annoyed, sure, pissed off at someone else, of course, but just – just _mad_ , and, mad at her? Had she done something? Had she—

Dorothy reappeared, in the joggers and tank top she favored for sleeping.

Relena was wincing.

“We were supposed to have drinks with your cousin tonight.”

“Correct.”

“I completely forgot about it, didn’t I.”

“It would appear so.”

“Dorothy,” Relena said, sitting up fully. “I am so, so sorry. Please, let me make it up to you. Let me make it up to your cousin.”

Dorothy sat down in the opposite chair with a very tight sigh.

“We need to talk.”

The thoughts, in Relena’s mind…paused, somehow. The shift in the air was palpable. Talk?

“Okay,” she said, quiet.

Dorothy was still looking at her.

“You’re spending too much time with Heero Yuy.”

Relena felt the change in her expression. “What?”

“With Heero Yuy. You’re spending too much time with him.”

“That’s…Dorothy, I…” her breathing felt off, somehow. “I’m really not sure how that’s your concern.”

Dorothy crossed her arms. “Have you given any more thought to class representative?”

Relena’s brows raised. “Is that what this is about? Dorothy, I – no, okay, I haven’t thought more about it.”

“The deadline is in _two days,_ Miss Relena.”

Her hackles raised, then. The _miss_ , again, oh it felt grating, somehow.

“Well, maybe I don’t want to do it, then.”

Dorothy hissed. “The only other applicants are two pompous assholes who think they deserve it only because of what is in their bank account and what is in their pants.” Dorothy’s eyes were glowing with malice. “They, do not, deserve it.”

“And I do?”

“Of course you do!”

“Dorothy!” Relena didn’t know why she was standing. “Maybe – maybe I don’t want it, okay? Maybe I – “ _don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it_ “ – maybe I don’t even want to be in this program, anymore.”

The silence that stretched…oh, it was dangerous.

It was…it was true, though. Christ it was true. This thing with Heero, the way she’d had actually zero interest in her studies, well. They’d sort of…amplified each other. She’d gotten a B on that East African dictators exam. A _B_ , and she hadn’t even cared.

Hadn’t cared. Hadn’t wanted to show her friends the grade ( _did Dorothy know?_ ), but, Relena hadn’t honestly cared enough to feel ashamed, really. Not when she found herself asking questions, now…in those quiet spaces before sleep.

She really didn’t want to tell Dorothy about those, at all.

The freeze frame on the television, of the woman stuck between laughing or crying, she wished she could just turn it off.

“What did you just say?”

Dorothy’s voice was just…oh so quiet, when she said it.

Relena put a hand against her face. “I said maybe I don’t even want to do it anymore.”

She turned and walked to the kitchen, not daring to turn around even when she heard Dorothy stand.

“You don’t mean it,” Dorothy dared, and Relena went directly to the cabinet beside the sink, getting a glass, filling it with water. She drank two long gulps.

“I don’t know.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

Relena half-turned. “Is it?”

“ _Relena_ ,” Dorothy swore, her fist tight on top of the counter. “That’s ridiculous! You were made for this! This is – “ her eyes nearly flared. “This is your _birthright!_ ”

Relena put down her glass. “I knew it! I knew that’s what this was about. I am _not_ my father, Dorothy.”

“You could be!”

“No! My father is _dead_ . His legacy is _dead!_ ”

“Yes but you are _alive!_ ”

“Yes well maybe I _shouldn’t be!_ ”

There it was. That’s what was going on, then. In her head, all the time, hidden so far in the back she could pretend it wasn’t there.

That was...that was the thought, though. That was _always_ the thought, the one she couldn’t talk about.

It should’ve been her, who died. 

Her father should still be alive. He had been _so beloved_ . He had done _such good work._ His legacy would _always overshadow her._ Relena…she could never be who he was. It was embarrassing to even _try._

Because here she was, studying the same field as he had so artfully mastered. Who was she, but some poor imitation? Who was she, but the simple daughter of a diplomat? Who was she to even _attempt_ to fill those shoes?

She wasn’t old enough yet to know what her passions were, not old enough yet to know what would drive her the rest of her life. But it just felt like…she just felt like…like maybe she was just…

Stalling for time, or something.

“Relena,” Dorothy breathed, and Relena frowned, sadly, at the floor.

“It’s fine.”

“It’s not.”

Relena looked up at her. At her friend, who had always been there for her, who was trying to be there for her now.

“Do you…do you really believe that?” Dorothy asked, all the anger of a moment ago lost.

Relena held her stare. “I don’t know.”

Dorothy’s gaze cooled. “ _Relena._ ”

“I don’t know,” she insisted.

“You’ve been thinking it.”

A pause. “Yes.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

Relena turned away again.

“Is it?”

She could hear Dorothy move, and was mostly expecting her, when she appeared next to her at the sink, in her peripheral vision.

“ _Yes_ ,” Dorothy swore. She seemed to spend a split-second on indecision, and then, she darted her hand forward, and covered Relena’s with her own. Relena couldn’t help the way her hand curled in on itself.

“You are not your father,” Dorothy acknowledged, and a part of Relena recoiled too. “But you are _good_ for this. Whether or not you think it is good for you. And,” she licked her lips, and Relena found herself preparing for the worst, somehow. “Honestly, it just – it _behooves you_ , to try.”

She tried to process the words. Honestly, she did, but, the feelings were too complicated for a single conversation over a sink. Was Dorothy right? Ugh. Thoughts and feelings flashed through her heart and her mind. She’d been – she’d been prepared for more of a fight, maybe. No she’d been preparing herself to drop the program, probably, descend into an abyss of indecision.

“I got a B on Professor G’s last exam,” she admitted, and Dorothy’s hand pulsed over her own.

“I know.”

Relena released a tangled sort of laugh. God. Of course Dorothy knew. She shook her head and looked away. That was… Relena stared at the fruit bowl, full of the produce Dorothy insisted they have on hand. She didn’t even _like_ pears, much, but, it was nearly full of them. _God_.

“You really think…that…that Heero’s…” She didn’t want to say this. She didn’t even want to say it. Relena took a quick breath. “You really think he’s bad for me?”

She was waiting for Dorothy to respond, so when she didn’t, Relena had to do the awful thing of turning around. Dorothy was looking right at her.

“ _Yes_ ,” she said, with an earnestness Relena hated.

She didn’t even want to wonder whether Dorothy was right. She didn’t want to _think_ at all. Not now. Not any time soon. Her stomach tightened, then, tightened right into a knot. She tried to remember the last thing they’d said to each other, the last thing she’d said to him – was it a text? It would’ve been a text – but it was a blur, muddied with all the other nice memories she was trying so hard not to think about.

“I’ll…I’ll tell him tonight,” she said, and she moved away before Dorothy could say anything else to console her.

Breaking up with Heero was…could she even really call it a break-up? They’d barely started seeing each other, just a few weeks of near-rabid hook-ups, flirtatious text messages, a few phone calls when she’d made up some excuse (“tell me again about Muammar Gaddafi?”)

But it was surprising to her how… _cold_ her life felt, suddenly, without the backdrop of Heero. She tried to ignore it, for a bit, just chalked it up to a good thing gone too soon, or something like that, as she rededicated herself to her studies. She applied for the representative position, because, well, because Dorothy thought she should, and she was surprised by the immediate swell of support she received from friends and classmates after the candidates were announced.

She’d thought that she’d more or less blended in.

Relena was standing in line in the cafeteria the first time it happened.

She liked the salad bar, because it seemed fresh, and on Wednesdays they included this herbed cannellini bean thing that she sort of really enjoyed.

It had been raining for most of the week, so she was wondering what sort of soups they had, and whether it would be too filling to have both soup and salad in the middle of the day. Dorothy wasn’t with her so she had no soundboard; she was in her Latin class, the one with the TA Dorothy didn’t want Relena to know she was sleeping with. And just as she was getting near the front of the line, Relena looked towards the doors…and saw Heero stride right through them.

His hair was still wet from the rain, and he had this industrial looking messenger bag slung over his back. He nodded to the badge attendant, his pace brisk, and Relena felt interminably rooted to the spot. They hadn’t – it was just – well it was a big campus, really, and there were so many students. In the whole course of their relationship (relationship? Courtship? _Fling?_ ) they’d never managed to run into each other, somehow, without some minor preordained planning. She knew he didn’t like to spend time at the libraries, preferring to study in his own space. She knew he didn’t like to eat in the cafeteria, preferring to grab something and eat outside irregardless of weather.

It was just, she was so surprised to see him, was all.

And she was so, so surprised, at the uncomfortable _squeeze_ in her chest, at just the sight.

Relena snapped her attention back on the line, her heart suddenly racing. Where was he? She really didn’t want to run into him with any greater proximity; she had no idea what she’d say to him, what she _wanted_ to say to him.

The line moved forward and she grabbed a to-go container instead of the plate, dumping things haphazardly into it as she moved at a rapid clip through the line. She wasn’t even sure what she was adding, and she cursed and had to go back when she realized she’d forgotten the cannellini beans. She was being ridiculous.

Heero probably didn’t even care; he’d probably moved on, even. Their _fling_ had ended so easily, so… No, she didn’t want to think about it. Certainly not about the way he was silent, when she told him over the phone that she had to cancel their plans for the weekend (motorcycle ride to the coast, this one pie restaurant he’d been to before) and in fact, she had to cancel their foreseeable plans, so she could focus on her studies instead.

God what a terrible thing to say to a person. Just – awful, really.

Relena bounced on her toes as she stood in line for the check-out, holding her badge in one hand. She didn’t want to do the obvious thing of turning around to make sure he wasn’t somewhere nearby, but she also desperately wanted to turn around and make sure he wasn’t nearby. But it was better to have deniability; add to that she knew from too much experience that she was a terrible liar, and that she couldn’t very successfully pretend she hadn’t seen him, when she did.

“Badge?” the clerk asked, formal, and Relena forced a polite smile as she tapped it.

Nothing.

God were her hands sweating? Maybe they were sweating.

She tapped it again.

Nothing.

Crap!

Panic was starting to set in, and she pushed hair behind her ear. God she just wanted to get out of there. She tapped it again, holding it down this time, knowing her palms were moist. Crap.

“Maybe try wiping it off first,” the clerk suggested, bored, and Relena tried to smile again as she did that, rubbing it over her jeans.

She prayed to whatever god was in charge of electronic card readers, held her breath, and tapped again.

…Nothing.

“There, there must be something wrong with it. I’ll um. I’ll go get it checked out,” she said, absolutely _pathetic_ , and she was just putting down her box salad, when a hand shot out into her peripheral vision, and her heart jumped right into her throat, because, the hand was dropping his card down onto the reader, it was _pinging_ delightfully, and Heero Yuy was there to save her day in the cafeteria line.

Oh, her everloving god.

“My hero,” the clerk drawled, sarcastic, and she waved them through dismissively.

Relena…couldn’t seem to coordinate her limbs, at first.

But she lurched into movement, nothing if not determined not to die of embarrassment in _line_ , probably, taking a few steps, her stomach twisting in on itself as Heero matched her stride, and they walked out of the cafeteria together.

Relena tucked hair behind her ear again.

“Um, thank you,” she said, and she was glad her voice didn’t crack. She hazarded a glance in his direction, and was relieved to see he was facing as resolutely forward as she was.

“Don’t mention it,” he said, and Relena wondered if her chest might actually cleave in two.

She was holding the salad in front of her, and she noticed when his gaze darted to it, and held on something. Did he – was he going to offer to eat together? She couldn’t remember if he had a class soon. _Probably_ , because, why else would he be hanging around, but.

“D’you – “ she started to say, which was exactly when Heero mumbled, “See you around,” and, there was a moment of just looking at each other, right near the doors that led outside.

The rain was a steady pitter patter on the pavement out there. He didn’t have a rain jacket, but, he apparently didn’t want one either. His eyes were so dark and lovely.

She wished she had something to say to him then, something to make him stay, or, draw out the interaction, somehow. But – for what, really? She’d made her choice. She’d made it days and weeks ago, now. Two weeks, actually. Two whole weeks of…

“See you, Heero,” Relena mumbed, feeling lost and lonely, and Heero’s lips tightened as he looked her over.

“See you,” he agreed, and he ducked his head as he walked out into the rain.

  
  


And that would have been fine, that would have been what she _deserved_ , except, it was just...he was suddenly...everywhere. 

Getting coffee when she was about to get coffee. Printing something out when she was printing out something. Coming out of the classroom she was going in to. 

She just. She didn’t want to be thinking about him, is all, and she was pretty good at _not_ thinking about him when she was by herself in her suite and Dorothy was making dinner and everything was fine, but. 

It just didn’t _feel good_ , when they made eye contact. When they didn’t. When he walked right past her, when he walked all the way around her. It made her wonder how many times they’d done exactly that without her knowing (she had no good memory of Heero _before_ , only the Heero now, which was...making her sort of miserable, actually).

Relena resolved to avoid him, to not speak to him again, no matter how many times they inadvertently met. She liked rules. She was good at rules. Except, apparently, this one…because she broke it almost immediately.

  
  


She just needed to get out of the house.

Speeches were coming up in two weeks for the class representative thing, followed by a debate (a _debate_ , for crying out loud, this was torture, no, this was a PoliSci major), and she had plenty of class work to be doing besides, and Dorothy hovering making sure it was all getting done was absolutely _not_ helping her out, so.

She just needed to get out of the house. 

The campus had many beautiful libraries, but there was one that had always been her favorite. Dedicated to the housing and restoration of rare books, it was small, and had all these old-fashioned decorations; bookshelves with scrolled firenzes, big plush chairs, all these lovely little nooks filled with moldy old books that no one ever wanted or likely would want for a hundred years. Who wanted information on what ye olde pear yields were like in 1742? No one, that’s who.

It was heaven.

She headed there now, through the misty gray day, ducking around crowds of underclassmen. She smiled at the library clerk, and then found the perfect spot to drop her stuff. One trip to the bathroom, and she could settle here for hours.

Except, when she came back, someone had decided to ruin her entire life.

“Excuse me,” she said, too loud. “Can I help you?”

The head turned, and she chastised herself for not recognizing it beforehand because of _course_ she should have recognized it beforehand and she was already squeezing her eyes shut when he took a look at her face – 

It was Heero.

Damn him. _Damn him_ . This was reason number one why you should never tell _anyone_ your favorite secret places – he’d come to claim hers. Well, it was hers first.

“There weren’t any other places available.”

She found that very hard to believe, as she took up her chair, the one across from Heero’s chair, which had been the one she’d intended to sit in, having to move all of her stuff out of the way so she could sit in the other one instead. There was only a small, low coffee table between them.

“There are other libraries,” she murmured, not brave enough to make eye contact, yet. “You don’t even like studying in libraries.”

“Duo has someone over,” he explained, turning a page in his book. “They’ve _been_ over going on four days now, and it’s getting old. Excuse me for leaving the house.”

Relena pushed her shoulders back, sitting a little straighter. Well. Hmph.

“Fine,” she said, picking up a book, opening it to her spot. “Just, don’t make too much noise.”

Heero’s eyes flared, as if, he’d like to roll his eyes, or something, but they didn’t leave the page. 

Relena pulled out her book. 

Well. Fine.

Everything was fine.

Everything was...fine.

And it was, was the thing. Heero’s mannerisms, they were, well, familiar. She started making notes, as she liked to do, transitioning from sitting in the chair when she was using her laptop or reading and scribbling, to sitting on the floor in front of the coffee table when she wanted to use its surface. And at some point Heero was clearly looking over her proverbial shoulder (which was fine, she’d mostly forgotten about him) when he caught her off guard.

“You don’t need to worry about that part,” he said, and Relena’s attention snapped up.

“Excuse me?”

Heero leaned so his fingers could tap her notes.

“I said you don’t need that part. Doctor J thinks that guy’s full of shit, so he skips it. What you need is everything in the next chapter.”

Relena’s cheeks warmed. She’d - well - she’d forgotten that Heero had...that he’d done this.

“I didn’t ask for your help,” she said, short, and Heero’s gaze narrowed.

“No, but here I am, offering.”

They glared at each other for a moment, stubborn to stubborn. She didn’t – it would be easier to – gosh couldn’t they just be _awful_ to each other, just totally rude and ignore one another and just do that forever until one of them _died?_ That’s how this was supposed to go. Not – helpfulness. Not – this.

“I – “ she started to say, fighting off a wince, scrubbing her face. “I – don’t know how to be nice to you.”

Heero picked his book up again.

“You want me to leave?”

“No, I – “ she had no idea what to say. “No. It’s – helpful. It’s just... _it’s just_ …” she was acutely aware of their surroundings, that if she got kicked out of her favorite library she’d never forgive herself. She lowered her voice. “You just shouldn’t _want_ to help me, is all.”

Heero stared at her for a moment, his gaze unreadable, colorless, just as intense as always. She had such mixed emotions about that look, and she wished he would stop.

“We can be...friends,” he said, finally, and Relena’s shoulders softened, a bit.

“Friends,” she repeated.

“Yeah,” he said, looking back at his book. “Friends who study together. People do that.”

Relena bit her lower lip, watching his profile. _Friends who study together_ didn’t usually also have a very intimate familiarity with each other’s naked body, but, she wasn’t going to say that out loud. 

But – goodness, friends? Did she want to be friends with him? 

_Yes_ , she nearly sighed. Yes she did. And if it was awful, if it was _torture_ , to see him lick his fingertip before he turned a page, as his long dark lashes fanned across his cheeks while he read, well. That was her problem.

And it was a problem she could handle.

“Fine,” she said, eventually. She glanced up at him, caught his eye.

“Friends.”

  
  
  


Dorothy noticed when she started leaving the house more.

To Relena’s credit it took her a week, but, Dorothy had once tested at a genius-level IQ, and, that was...typically something she liked to think about, sometimes, when dealing with really idiotic men, or really boring professors. Or both.

God she hated this subject. Political Science. There was nothing scientific about politics, politics was something you did with your gut and your brain and your proverbial dick. She hadn’t learned a single god damn thing of use since they’d started this program, and she didn’t expect to learn anything before they left.

But that was fine. She wasn’t the most important part of all of this. No.

The most important part had appeared to finally be in a better mood lately, at least had started smiling again, which she had assumed was the result of her excellent friendship. It had in fact never occurred to her to think otherwise, until she noticed that this  _ most important thing _ was sneaking out of the suite every day, and was trying to be subtle about it. She wanted to ask, but.

Relena was the worst liar.

Honestly it was worse for the accuser than the accused, with her. Watching this beautiful woman splutter through a fabrication was painful. So Dorothy didn’t confront her outright. Partly because it just wouldn’t be fair, but more she just didn’t feel like alerting her suspicions. No, Dorothy knew what she was doing, which was why, on Monday afternoon, when it was raining like hell and Relena was stuffing her bag full of books and putting on her rainjacket anyway, with no classes until the next morning… Dorothy let her go.

And then obviously she followed.

It was easy enough in the rain. She just kept her hood up and followed Relena’s maroon (such a good color for her) umbrella as Relena maneuvered across campus. Where was she going? She’d already caffeinated so it wasn’t that. They’d had lunch together so it couldn’t be that either. Relena didn’t like to study in her own room as a general rule, true, but. Why be coy about that? 

Hm.

Dorothy watched with a cold, speculative gaze as Relena slipped into the old library. She couldn’t quite shake the feeling...that she was missing something. Was it just that Relena liked studying in this library in particular and didn’t want to drag Dorothy along? She knew well and good that Dorothy hated this library. Relena had dragged her in once or twice as undergrads, and Dorothy always found it to be...smelly. Small. Unnecessary. Too god damn quiet. Who the hell wanted a book about fruit production in the late 1700s? Only people who would never amount to anything, that’s who. They should turn the whole thing into a computer lab slash coffee bar and leave it at that. That was something people used. 

They could call it The Abyss even. See? No one ever thought around here.

So maybe it shouldn’t surprise her that Relena was studying there. Avoiding hearing your roommate complain was certainly a valid enough excuse, she supposed. Satisfied and also very much done with the (cold, awful, miserable) rain, Dorothy was about to turn back and head home, when she recognized an infuriatingly familiar head of hair through the window and she almost threw a rock.

Okay. It was not about the library, apparently.

Dorothy had to physically restrain herself from marching in right then and there. But she did what her therapist kept telling her to do, and counted her breaths. Maybe it was an accidental meeting. Maybe they weren’t even - okay. They were definitely sitting together.

Dorothy had to step over a bush, and she accidentally stepped in an annoyingly deep puddle, but she found a decent window for spying.

They were...well god damnit they weren’t making out, at all.

And the longer Dorothy watched, the more it honestly appeared as if they were simply...studying.

_ What _

Dorothy squinted against the glass, shading her eyes so she could see. Relena wasn’t...she wasn’t even flirting with him, apparently. They were literally just sitting in the same nook, not touching, not petting, not ogling, not even grinning. For all intents and purposes...they looked honest to god...focused on their work?

...What?

It was probably the most boring form of cheating she’d seen in her life. God - this is why Relena needed her. If the woman was going to go sneaking around behind her best friend’s back she could at least be doing something irresponsible! Ugh!

Dorothy debated what to do. Pridefully she still wanted to go running in there, wagging fingers, making a scene. 

But...over the last week...hm. And if she was working, well. 

That had been the problem with Heero, honestly. Relena had just given up on everything. Given up on school, given up on her future, given up on Dorothy. 

And Dorothy was glowering, still thinking, when she caught it.

Heero looked up, over the top of his laptop, and he...glanced at her. Glanced at her, but his gaze...held.

Dorothy’s blood came up from a simmer.

Oh ho. Okay. She knew that look. She knew it  _ well. _ She now knew exactly what was happening.

Dorothy leaned back away from the window, looked across the street. The sun had nearly set, leaving the air that dark, twilight gray. Not many people were around, and when they were, it was easy enough to blend in. Dorothy crossed and stood against the brick wall of some building, and waited.

Eventually she got tired of waiting and fired off a text: [ _ where are you?? _ ] – just enough to alarm her, not enough to really alarm her. Dorothy watched with grim satisfaction as Relena read it, panicked a bit, and started collecting her stuff. Ha. She didn’t even give Heero so much as a high five in leaving, so.  _ Ha _ . Dorothy noticed when Heero stared after her, and she had to sink back into the shadows as Relena passed her by on the other side of the street. 

She wasn’t waiting for Relena.

As predicted, Heero didn’t stick around much longer.

A dark grin spread across her face when he walked out the front doors, looking both ways, heading in the opposite direction Relena had gone. Dorothy knew quite a lot about Heero Yuy, at this point, and knew in fact that he lived eight blocks in that direction and two more blocks to the north.

She didn’t know it would be so easy to sneak up on him.

“I know what you’re doing.”

Heero swung around, hands already halfway up his sides when he recognized her, even in her hood, even in the darkening sky. He dropped his shoulders and his hands.

“Oh. It’s you.”

He turned around and started walking and Dorothy fought to keep from sniggering. She caught up to him easily, matching his longer stride.

“I know what you’re doing,” she said again.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yes,” she said. “It’s not going to work.”

Heero smirked. “We’ll see.”

Apparently he wasn’t even going to deny it. Interesting.

“I’m serious. I got her to dump you once already, I say the word and your little – your little  _ daliance _ – is over.”

He tilted his head at her, frowning. “We’re studying together. She got a B on the East African dictators exam.”

Dorothy straightened, voice waspish. “I know she got a B on the East African dictators exam.” Why did she sound so defensive when she said it? Heero was still walking, not looking at her. She had to skip to keep up. “Look,” she said, and she stepped into Heero’s path. “You? You are a distraction to her. And she needs to focus. I’m not going to have her fucking up her whole future over whatever the hell is between your legs.”

He looked at her for a moment, and it was long enough for Dorothy to realize a few things. For one: it had stopped raining. For another: he was taller...and stronger...and more unencumbered than her.

And they were mostly alone.

“Careful Dorothy,” he drawled, clearly getting bored. “If I didn’t know any better I’d say you were jealous”

Dorothy’s gaze narrowed. “Oh right.  _ Jealous _ . Now when you bartend, do they let you keep the cherries? Or is it like a discount thing.”

He smirked, stepping closer. “Jealous,” he whispered, and then he stepped right around her, and kept walking. 

Dorothy turned her head and glowered at his back. Oh, this fucker. This total, absolute, fucker. She should tell Relena to ditch him just to wipe that asinine smirk right off his face. But then – ugh. 

She’d...no.  _ Relena had finally started smiling again _ . 

And – it was, apparently, just studying. For Relena anyway. Whatever Heero’s master ploy he clearly sucked at it, so. If they kept it in the library... Dorothy’s frown deepened. Well. She didn’t have to like it. She didn’t have to like it at all. But if it helped Relena... Dorothy would be a complete, and utter, fool to make it stop.

For now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, like Relena, I have things to do irl. this is going on hiatus for two studious weeks!


	3. miss mabel's guide to polite kissing in public

A scattered few days passed, and Relena found she was getting back into a sort of rhythm. Just, definitely not with her current project.

“What’re you working on?”

Relena looked up. Heero was still using his laptop, in the chair slightly above her. Suddenly she wasn’t sure if this was something they’d ever talked about. “Speeches, for…” Was this stupid? This was maybe stupid. “For the class representative thing.”

“Ah.”

“Ah?”

“Well you’re doing that, then.”

“Well—“ she didn’t know what to say. She felt awkward, then. “Yes. Dorothy thinks I should.” She also thought it wise that Relena meet up with a friend of hers tonight, which, Relena was...not putting much thought into.

“And you don’t?”

“I—“ Okay this was definitely stupid. Relena tapped her pen on the page. “I’m not even sure _why_ I’m doing it.”

Heero leaned back in his chair. “You’d be good at it.”

Relena felt the instinct to look away, but, she punished herself into holding Heero’s stare. “I know.”

“You know.”

“I, well. Yes. I do know. I...I held some offices in my boarding school, when...when I was a teenager, back home.”

She saw his cheek twitch, but she didn’t have to throw anything at him, because he managed to keep from grinning. “Yes,” she drawled, “you are in fact sharing a study space with a senior class president.”

“And here I haven’t even asked for your autograph yet.”

Oh she was definitely going to throw something. 

“I had an idea of why I was running then. There were things to do. But now…” Relena looked at her speech. “What do I even say? Elect me because...just because?”

“That more or less seems to sum up most elections, yes.”

Relena shook her head. She paused, then. Looked at him. “Who is representative for your class?”

Heero thought for a moment, then frowned. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know? Don’t you have any?”

“I just don’t know their names.”

“Heero.” Okay she was teasing _him_ now. “You can’t remember their names? You know the name and political affiliation of the congressman from Maryland’s eighteenth district.”

“Yes well _she_ is important.”

Relena pointed a finger. “This is, actually, exactly my point.”

Heero was smirking again, but it finally didn’t feel at her expense. “So?” he said, like it was easy. “Make it important.”

Relena stared back at her speech. Important? She heard the snap of Heero’s laptop before she realized he was standing.

“Come on.”

She looked up at him, still blinking. “What?”

“We’re leaving. I can show you something.”

“Show me —“

“Yeah, get your stuff.”

Relena did, mildly distracted, ignoring the warmth in her stomach as she put her notebooks and pens away, managing not to run into any of Heero’s arms or legs as they both packed up in a relatively small space. They headed out into the world, Heero leading with a quick clip, marching right across campus. She kept up (barely), not wanting to tell him to slow down just for her, not really wanting him to notice her effort, because, well, if he slowed down just for her then there was maybe something more than polite about this journey, or something, and that was not something they did. Anymore.

They walked into the PoliSci building, Relena a bit breathless, and took the stairs to the second floor. It was closing time on Monday evening, only underclassmen were about because their professors generally had lesser seniority, but.

Heero stopped in front of a closed classroom door, standing in front of the windowpane that went through it. He stayed there until Relena stepped up to see what he was seeing, and didn’t move away all at once.

Class was not in session, and, far down at the bottom of the amphitheater-style room, a janitor was cleaning up for the day. He was older, but still on his feet, his gait shuffling a bit as he vacuumed.

“That’s Bryant. His son is serving life in prison for stealing a pair of hedge clippers.”

“I’m sorry, for stealing _what?_ ”

Heero didn’t repeat himself. “He’d had some other offenses before that, mostly other petty theft, junk from his youth, so, he was labeled a repeat offender. The issue is twofold: his son should not be serving a life sentence for theft of garden equipment, and Bryant won’t be promoted and can’t retire in part because of his son.”

“Okay I’m lost.”

Heero looked at her. “He was passed over for a promotion seven years ago, that would have paid him well enough and given him the benefits to retire last year. His lesser salary is now also supporting his grandchildren, so he can’t afford to quit.”

The words processed in her mind.

“That is just – “ She had no follow-up.

“Come on.”

Relena turned just in time to see Heero start walking away, and she worked to keep up again. Why was he walking so _fast?_ “There is a huge pay discrepancy on this campus, and it falls exactly on all the gender and race lines it always does. It of course permeates the lower ranks for employees like Bryant, but it goes all the way up, too.” They were approaching the professor’s offices, a long, narrow hallway that curved around this corner of the building. It was after five by now; of course it was empty. 

Heero held the door open to her, and she stepped inside, walking ahead somewhat blindly. Heero followed her, and as they passed closed doors, Heero read out their names.

“Professor Calhoun, annual salary: $120,455. Professor Frank, annual salary: $84,622. Professor Kaur, annual salary: $108,323. Professor Echevaria, $70,117…”

It went on and on like that. Heero knew, somehow, without even looking it up ( _without even looking it up_ ) what every single professor made in their department. It was surreal.

“Okay, I get it.”

They were reaching the end of the long hallway.

“I could go on,” Heero offered, voice gruff, low. Sounding too loud in the relative quiet. “Scholarships...housing...earning power of previous classes…”

She was looking at him, knowing her gaze was tense as she thought through all his implications. She didn’t want to ask the obvious question: _so…so what?_ What could she honestly do about any of it?

“As a student, you can do nothing,” he said, because the question must be written on her face. “As representative…” He shifted his weight. “You probably couldn’t do a lot more. But you could try.”

“What’s to say that Echevaria just didn’t publish as much as Calhoun?”

“She published _twice_ what he did, in the past five years.”

Relena was chewing on the inside of her cheek. “And I assume you have, well, proof, of all this.”

Heero took a step closer. It was a natural motion, because reasonably it was time to head back to the library, or whatever, but it brought him within reach, and, she had to steel herself so she wouldn’t lean away.

Or closer, or something.

“Of course,” he said, flippant. Relena found she was still frowning, her teeth still caught on the inside of her cheek, as she looked up at him.

“Hm.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Hm?”

“Well, it’s something to think about.”

Heero smirked.

Her stomach clenched, then, because, well, because it was the sort of smirk that usually preceded an arm thrown around her shoulders, or a very thorough kiss. She felt warmth bloom across her the skin of her cheeks, and she looked away before the ideas could keep propagate in her head.

“Shall we?”

They walked back out of the building in decently comfortable silence, Relena thinking mostly about her speech, Heero thinking whatever thoughts occupied him.

Relena came to a sudden stop.

“Wait.”

Heero curved his path so he would stop in front of her.

“What time is it?”

He checked his watch. “Almost 5:30.”

“ _Crap_ ,” Relena swore, looking across campus.

“You got somewhere to be?”

“It’s – it’s Dorothy. There’s – well I’m supposed to – “ She was getting flustered. Could she run all the way and make it on time? Yes, but, she’d destroy her shoes. These were the flats that were slightly too big and oh god she _hated_ these shoes. “I'm late for a — I’m late for a _date_ ,” she said, exasperated.

Oh she didn’t want to look at Heero’s face. She didn’t want to see it at all, she just wanted to do a better job of keeping track of her time. Pre-dinner drinks, _pre-dinner drinks_ , and, she wasn’t even ready, and –

“I’ve got my bike.”

Her stomach clenched again.

She wouldn’t look at him, still. “No, it’s – I can run. If I run I can make it.”

“It’s easily three miles. My bike is in the parking lot.”

Her heart was beating too fast, her cheeks still warm. No, she didn’t want to do this, she’d sacrifice the shoes.

“You’re – you’re sure?”

He ducked his head, and she was finally forced to look at him.

“Yeah,” he said, simple, plain, like of course he was sure.

It didn’t make her heart beat any slower.

“Fine,” she said, and Heero turned on his heel and started walking briskly toward the PoliSci building’s small parking lot. Relena took a shaky breath. Okay, she could do this. She could definitely do this. No big deal. No big deal, right?

She took off after him, shrugging her shoulder bag up higher, steeling her nerves. She’d been on his motorcycle before, maybe half a dozen times, so, it really shouldn’t be any big thing. This was just one...friend...doing a favor for another...friend. No big deal.

No big deal.

Heero took his helmet out of the seat and handed it to her, easy and casual, dropping his bag in its place and swinging his leg over. Relena buckled the helmet, mentally reviewing the route. It was only a few blocks, give or take. _Give or take_ , no big deal, no big deal. She hooked her bag across her chest as Heero revved the engine to life, and then she swallowed quickly, before getting on behind him.

She put her arms around his torso, because, she always put her arms around his torso, clasping her one hand onto her other wrist over Heero’s light jacket. Had he run an errand before classes? She couldn’t remember if he usually drove to school or not. Maybe he went for a ride. Maybe she shouldn’t think about it.

“It’ll just be a few minutes,” he murmured, soft, gentle, and Relena nodded — unsure, after a moment, whom he’d said the words for.

She hated the smell of his detergent. No, she didn’t, actually, she really liked it. It had been only a few weeks since she’d been…well, not so casually leaning _into_ this hold, really. When her heart could handle this level of proximity with ease and comfort.

Now she had the heart of a baby rabbit, or something, with the baby rabbit nerves to match.

Heero eased them slowly through campus, steering around pedestrians, heading onto city streets. There was a moderate amount of traffic, but, it wasn’t hard at all to weave around cars. At red lights she fought to look away from the thick texture of his hair, she made sure to lean away the perfunctory distance, because, she didn’t need to hold on when they were stopped, of course.

They said nothing.

Heero finally turned on to her street _(of course he didn’t need directions)_ , and Relena finally cleared her throat.

“Just here, thanks. I can walk the rest of the way.”

Maybe she should have expected an argument, but, Heero did as he was told. A block away from her building he pulled up to the curb and turned off the engine, waiting for her to get off first. She did, clearing her throat gently, unbuckling the helmet and checking to see whether the lights were on in her suite. It was too far away to tell. Dorothy would be waiting for her, obviously; this was her friend she was late to meet, and Dorothy had probably sent one thousand angry texts already. Oh goodness.

“Thank you,” Relena said, handing over the helmet. “For the, well, for the ride, and, for…everything.”

Heero was staring at her, steadfast, while Relena really couldn’t manage to look him completely in the eye. Which was terrible for her, she was never this… _timid_ , or whatever this was. Goodness. She heaved a sigh, dropping her shoulders resolutely, and Heero took the helmet back.

“No problem,” he said, and Relena looked him in the eye.

She hated how handsome he looked, in the streetlights. It was unfair, the shadows they cast, the way they cast a vague sort of glimmer to his dark eyes, highlighting them beautifully. His _bone structure_ , or something, that’s all it was. That’s all it was.

“You’ll be late for your date,” he reminded her, and Relena knew it was true and still couldn’t find it within her to move.

“It’s – yes. Dorothy. She – “ Why was she still talking? “ – She has this...idea, or, this list, rather.” Stop talking. “I’m not totally sure actually. She’s ranking potential suitors for me, apparently.” This was embarrassing. Why were the words coming out? She bit her lower lip, suppressing a wince, and: “I’ve no idea where this one lands.”

Heero was still staring at her, his eyes glowing, and she just wanted to push him over his stupid motorcycle and flee.

“I’m sure they’re great.”

Relena nodded. “Yes, well.” God _you know what_ there was something _wrong with her_ , “I should. Well. I should go. Thanks,” _you’ve already said that_. She withheld most of the wince, this time. “Speeches are the day after tomorrow, so I think I have enough time. I appreciate the help.”

And then because she was a total disaster, Relena threw out her hand.

As in, for, a _handshake_ , or something.

Heero’s eyes took on a delighted gleam, as if, oh as if he was so _amused_ , but, it’s not as if you can _retract_ an awkward handshake, and, it was just the streetlights, really, or the fact that she was trying to transition to date mode, or something, and maybe had just flipped her switch too early, or – oh god.

Heero took her hand, shaking it gently, and his palm was warm and dry.

“Good night,” she said, and before she could make a bigger ass of herself, she turned, and skipped the rest of the way to her building.

Dorothy was livid, which was expected really, but then she already had her outfit picked out, so.

Sylvia Noventa was lovely. Really, she was, she was smart and sweet and pretty, and probably just Relena’s type, if she were interested. She regretted the whole second half of their drinks that turned into dinner, because twenty minutes in she realized she’d be wanting no more than friendship, and she leaned far too heavily into that, and really had to convince herself that Sylvia’s stab of disappointment, when Relena said she didn’t want to get dessert – that she didn’t think it was deserved.

Of course it was deserved, so.

She just wasn’t doing so great with social interactions tonight, so.

They had a much less awkward handshake, followed by a genuinely good-natured hug, before getting into separate cabs. 

Dorothy was waiting for her when she got through the door.

“Well?” she asked, a mostly-empty glass of red wine beside her.

“She was nice,” Relena offered, kind, shrugging off her coat and slipping off her shoes. She’d kept on the terrible flats, which had honestly probably contributed to part of her distraction during dinner. She should throw out those shoes.

“Of course she was nice,” Dorothy said, standing. “And? Are you going to call her?”

Relena ignored her friend, taking a minute to continue down the hall to her room. It had been a long day. She just wanted her pajamas.

Dorothy stopped in her doorway, watching as Relena changed. They’d done boarding school together, were pros when it came to changing clothes in a crowd. Relena pulled off her sweater and unhooked her bra from under her shirt. It was a fine enough shirt to sleep in.

“Well?”

Oh. She’d nearly forgotten about the question.

“Um, I don’t know,” Relena said, hedging as she changed into pajama pants.

“You don’t know?”

Relena pulled on her fuzzy socks, and let out a breath as she stood, then eased around Dorothy. “I don’t know,” she confirmed.

She walked down the hallway toward the kitchen, knowing that Dorothy was following her.

“Relena. Do you know how hard it was to get you this date? Sylvia Noventa is only in town for the week and I got her to meet with you!”

“She mentioned that. She’ll be back in a month.”

“And – “ Dorothy paused at the entrance to the kitchenette, as Relena went to the bottle of wine still on the counter and poured herself a small glass. “You should see her in a month.”

Relena took a quick sip. “I told you,” she said. “I don’t know.”

Dorothy was standing too still, her lower lip pressed too hard into the upper one. “Do you know who her parents are?”

Relena nodded, looking away. “Yes.”

“The two of you together – Miss _Relena_ – “

Relena threw up her hands. “I’m not sure. Maybe we’ll see each other again in a month, maybe we won’t. She was nice. I’m not sure what else you want me to say.”

“I want you to acknowledge that she could be a very advantageous partner!”

“Is she on the list?”

Silence descended, quick and sudden, like someone had left the window open, like someone had sucked out all the air.

Dorothy was standing very, very still.

“What are you talking about.”

Relena stared at her toes, pushing at some sort of dirt on the floor. Dorothy enlisted a housekeeper; there should not be dirt on their floor. “I heard,” she started, sighing. She looked up. “I heard you had a list of potential matches for me.”

Dorothy had always, _always_ been good at controlling her outward emotions. Now was no exception. There was some sort of calculated battle going on within her brilliant mind, some sort of mental gymnastics she would never reveal. That was as much as Relena could gather, at the moment.

“Who told you that,” Dorothy said, and her voice was ice. Like breathing on ice.

“It’s true, isn’t it?”

Another strained silence, where Dorothy tried to think faster than she could feel.

“Well,” Dorothy said, and she licked her lips. “One of us has to be thinking about the future.”

Relena looked away, sharp, not yet willing to move.

“And that’s you?”

Dorothy straightened, her shoulders going back.

“I think I’m qualified, yes.”

“Dorothy,” Relena said, softly incredulous. “That’s insane.”

“Is it?”

“Yes!” Relena breathed. She wished she could just reach for the wine, but she was wound so tight. She already knew it would end up down the sink. “Yes, Dorothy. Goodness, we’re both still so young. We have our whole lives ahead of us! You’re talking like we have to make our whole life plan right now.”

“Is this about the bartender? _Relena – “_

“His name is Heero,” Relena cut in, and her voice was unintentionally harsh. She knew her shoulders were hiked up, her arms tight around her chest. “And, no, it’s – it’s not about him.”

Relena wouldn’t make eye contact, after she’d said it, though.

_Guilt._

That’s what it was. Honest to god guilt, why she couldn’t look Heero in the eye, after accepting the ride, why she was struggling now. She felt…she felt as if she were abusing these people, somehow. Abusing them without knowing why they allowed it, and, that made it worse, somehow, because, surely what she _deserved_ was –

“Miss Relena. Whether or not you think it’s appropriate, it’s time to start thinking about your future. Class representative is but one step – “

“God, _enough_ about class representative!”

Dorothy rankled. “Speeches are in _two days!_ And you’ve written nothing!”

“I – “ How did she know that? “I’m working on it!”

“ _Miss Relena_ , just say the word. I know the right people, I can get us some ideas. Just say the word and – ”

“Jesus, Dorothy!”

“What! I told you! Your future – “

“I said I’m working on it!”

“And I’m saying you don’t _have to!_ ”

“ _Who is number one?_ ”

When had they both started shouting? They were both definitely shouting.

Now they weren’t, though. The words Relena’d yelled were hanging in the air, now, suspended between them.

“Tell me, Dorothy. Tell me who number one is,” she said, and her gaze was sharp and brittle.

Dorothy was breathing slightly harder; these little, furious breaths puffing from her nose and from between her teeth. And without having to be told, without even having to wait for Dorothy to come up with an answer…Relena knew.

“It’s...you, isn’t it?”

Dorothy said nothing. Her expression did not change, her gaze did not waver.

“It’s you.”

“ _Of course_ it’s me,” she snarled, and Relena pressed back into the counter. “It’s me – it’s _always been me_ , and it _should be me._ ”

Dorothy slammed her closed fist down onto the counter.

“And whether or not we ever _fuck_ , you are _not_ getting rid of me. So write your damn speech. Call Sylvia. I’m going to bed.”

Dorothy spun on her heel, and left the room.

And Relena never finished her glass of wine.

They had been friends for too long for a single fight to ever get between them, no matter how loaded. Relena in general wasn’t the type of person to hold a serious grudge for non-serious reasons, so, when Dorothy knocked on her door the next day, midmorning, with another two hours to go before their next class, the door was already unlocked.

Dorothy nudged the door open, and crossed her arms, leaning on the jamb.

Relena didn’t look up from her desk. She had the table light on, still, her hair up in a messy bun, lower lip between her teeth. She was on the second draft, maybe, or part of a second draft, her laptop open on the desk, Heero’s spreadsheet visible, a few internet searches stopped mid-scroll.

“You’re writing,” Dorothy observed, in what Relena understood, only from years of experience, to be Dorothy’s cautious voice.

“Hm,” Relena confirmed, glancing at her computer. She scratched something out on her legal pad, trying a different phrase instead.

“This is for tomorrow?”

Relena still didn’t look up. “Uh. Yeah,” she drawled, skimming the spreadsheet, cross-referencing her (barely above basic) internet search skills.

There was a few moments of silence, that Relena didn’t really acknowledge, because she was distracted.

“New pen?” Dorothy asked, because apparently she hadn’t left yet.

Relena glanced at the pen, then at her work. She looked at the wall, and sighed, putting the pen down. She turned to look at Dorothy.

“Yeah,” she said, gentle. They’d been friends for a long time. Dorothy knew she was particular about pens. “It’s – nice. I can finally write as fast as I can think, almost.”

Dorothy nodded, making a vaguely impressed face.

“That’s good.”

It was a…softening, almost. A testing of the waters. Would either of them bite?

No. Of course not. Not over…not over this.

Relena tilted her head to the side. “I’ll show it to you when I’m done, yeah?”

Dorothy nodded, finally meeting her eyes, nodding again. She was holding a mug. “Yes. I think – that would be a good idea,” she said, and Dorothy leaned off the doorway. “This is for you,” she added, as Dorothy put the cup of steaming tea down on Relena’s desk.

And Relena was smiling an affectionate sort of smile – a soft, nearly teasing sort of smile – as Dorothy’s back disappeared back down the hall.

Dorothy Catalonia’s least favorite phrase in the English language – nay, in any language, actually – was _I’m sorry_.

There was nothing weaker, nothing more sniveling, nothing that ceded your power so much as those two little words. She made a general habit of never using them, either consciously or unconsciously, though the instinct would sometimes catch her unawares.

She knew she _should_ apologize to Relena, probably, but, she would probably die before uttering the phrase, so.

And Relena was someone she _liked._

The day leading up to the speeches passed in a blur. They had lunch together, they went to class, Relena cloistered herself in her room while Dorothy reviewed the work and ignored some rather preening text messages.

They had class first on Wednesday, their big, generic lecture which everyone was required to attend and today everyone actually did, because of the speeches that would take place after. Doktor S had reserved the room for an extra hour.

“You okay?” Dorothy murmured, when Doktor S closed out his powerpoint, and turned on the full brightness of the lights.

Relena was sitting right next to her, by all observations nonplussed. _Unenthused_ , even. As if she was about to do nothing more than walk into the dentist’s. She’d always been braver than Dorothy, always had stronger nerves than her, somehow.

“Yeah,” Relena answered, as excitable chatter broke out around them, and Doktor S’s TA took over.

“Fifteen minutes maximum!” he was shouting, above the din. “Alphabetical order, please, Chad Brandon, then Brad Charleston, please…Relena,” he added, because everyone knew who she was, and she was sitting close to the front. “You’ll be last, okay? It’s just alphabetical.” Relena nodded, eyes distant, resolute.

“I’ll be in the back,” Dorothy murmured, and as Chad, Brad, and Relena collected their stuff and took seats in the front, Dorothy grabbed her shoulder bag and headed up the stairs.

This was how they handled stress: Relena could face it, Dorothy preferred to flee and regroup. It had always been like this. It was part of the reason Dorothy knew she’d never be successful in politics herself, always destined for a life behind the scenes.

Chad and Brad’s speeches are terrible.

They’re honestly barely above mediocre, and that’s only because technically all the words were in the appropriate language. Dorothy couldn’t help but sneer throughout, arms crossed as she paced behind the back row of seats, where there was a landing before the doors that went in and out.

Both speeches got too much applause, which was fine, because it didn’t even matter. Both men had average grades but excellent pedigrees. If Brad had _any_ affinity for the female sex or the female gender he would be on the list. She got the feeling that Chad would be convicted for statutory rape one of these days, so he had never been considered. 

Ugh, the list. How Relena knew – well, Dorothy didn’t want to think about it. They’d talk about it later.

It was Relena’s turn.

And just as she got up to go to the podium, the door to Dorothy’s left opened, and a figure slipped inside the room.

God, she should really be surprised.

Dorothy looked around to see if anyone else noticed him come in. Everyone else was quiet, watching the front, waiting for Relena to start.

“You nearly missed it,” Dorothy whispered, voice hushed. Heero turned. His closest shoulder dropped when he recognized her.

“She told me I could come,” he whispered back, but Dorothy had already figured that out.

“Does it look like I care? She’s giving her speech. That’s what I care about.”

Heero grunted. He dropped his pack on the ground, crossing his own arms, vaguely mimicking Dorothy’s stance. They had to stand somewhat close, because Dorothy didn’t want to be overheard. It was only fifteen minutes.

Relena started her speech.

For a moment both of them just listened to the sound of Relena’s voice echoing throughout the room, Dorothy’s nerves receding with every word she knew so well, by now. 

Relena had…she’d always been so good at this.

“She looks good,” Heero murmured, and Dorothy knew what he meant. She looked...she looked _powerful_ , up there. Confident. A leader. Though, surely, in her pastel green sweater, with her cheeks rosy from the warm lights, and her eyes sharply blue, she looked wonderful.

“Yes,” Dorothy agreed. She spent a minute considering Heero. What had he said? _She told me I could come?_ Hmph. At one of their study sessions, no doubt.

“I’m guessing you had something to do with this,” Dorothy murmured.

Heero shifted his weight. “And you didn’t? I find it hard to believe that Relena wouldn’t have you proof her speech.”

“Of course I proofed her speech. But the content didn’t come from me. Just – “ they paused, Relena’s voice echoing on a particular line Dorothy loved, “ – that part.”

“That was a good part.”

Dorothy tipped up her chin. “The content wasn’t mine, though.”

“Well,” Heero said, leaning away, looking closer. _Teamwork_ , Dorothy’s mind supplied, to her eternal fury. There was no _teamwork_ , here. This was _her job_. This was her duty, really, because she had recognized Relena for all the potential she had a _decade_ ago. Relena had been born with all the instincts and sincerity of her father, and the beauty and intelligence of her mother.

Relena was going to rule the world, one day, and Dorothy was going to be right next to her when she did.

Up on the stage, behind the podium, the lights shining brightly – Relena was mesmerizing.

“She was born for this,” Dorothy couldn’t help saying.

Heero grunted, again.

Dorothy looked at him, sharp. “I’m serious. This is what she’s going to do. Haven’t you noticed? Goodness, the way – the way people flock to her? She can’t even help it. Everyone loves her. They do it on _instinct._ ”

Heero turned his head half in her direction, not meeting her stare. It occurred to Dorothy, somewhat gleefully, that Heero would know that problem _intimately_. Ha.

And maybe it was that sense of personal pride, but…she found herself softening, somewhat, to Heero’s condition. Dorothy had spent most of her teen years hopelessly in love with Relena Darlian, and had only let it go after careful, honest consideration. And therapy. Plenty of therapy.

“She’s been better, since,” Dorothy started. Relena was getting close to her crescendo, close to her closing argument. Not a single other person in the room was speaking. “Since you’ve started spending time together again.”

She saw Heero’s hand tighten on his arm, and Dorothy faced front.

“She wasn’t…she wasn’t doing well, for awhile, after. But she’s doing better now.”

Heero didn’t respond, but likely because he honestly couldn’t. Everyone was listening, completely enraptured, as Relena got to _the good part_. 

Her _closing arguments_ , where she leashed all of the passion her heart held, the part where she insisted – where she _dared_ them to consider an alternative. The choice she was not giving them was not Relena vs Chad vs Brad. It was good vs evil, it was morality vs sodomy. It was dark vs light. 

There _wasn’t_ a choice, really – and when Relena finished, just for a single moment, there was absolute, incredible silence in the room.

And then the applause erupted.

Dorothy's mouth twisted in a sneer, triumphant – _jubilant_ even – as some of the more fanciful students got to their feet to clap even louder. Chad and Brad looked dazed and despondent.

And Relena – she gazed right up to the back of the room. Not looking at anyone else. She looked right up to where it was dark, where she could surely barely find her outline, but where she knew Dorothy was standing, and together, they locked eyes.

She knew, too.

Relena was back.

It was a week between the speeches and the debates, general topics posted in advance. Relena couldn’t even find time to study with Heero anymore, their elicit meetings sacrificed for Dorothy’s form of debate prep, which involved more people than Relena thought Dorothy knew by name. And actually, honestly, Dorothy did not seem to in fact know all of their names.

But Alec and Brianne and Mercedita knew a lot about the subjects Relena had spoken about in her speech, which incidentally had become her rallying cry. Nothing would come of it, surely, but, they would try. Try to make the world a little better.

Relena was crossing campus the day before the debates, having forced Dorothy off for a single hour of privacy while she went for a run. It was autumn in all its glory, now: leaves were crisp, golden or red, the campus awash in color.

Which was maybe why she didn’t recognize him all at once.

“ _Relena!_ ”

She turned her head, trying to track the voice, and nearly slipped on a wet patch of grass.

“Oh my god are you okay?” the voice said, seemingly much closer, and Relena turned and found Quatre Raberba Winner crossing quickly towards her.

She was still in cool down mode, so she wasn’t as breathless as she’d been half a mile ago, but, the shock or something must have been what made her breathing uneven. “Quatre!”

“Here, come here. Goodness I almost made you break an ankle.”

Her smile splashed. “I’m alright, honest.” She took a few practice steps. “See? All’s well.” He finally grinned, soft, and Relena nearly poked him in the arm. “What’re you doing here!”

“Oh! Right!” Quatre’s grin spread so wide she could see nearly every single one of his teeth. His cheeks took on a slight tinge of pink. “I’m transferring!”

“You’re transferring? – What – _here?_ ”

“Yes! I’m starting in the spring semester! I was just taking a walk before – “ he stopped himself. “Well, I had some free time.”

“That’s fantastic!”

The grin softened, somewhat. “It is.”

A thought flashed through her mind, suddenly, a wondering sort of thought, about whether Dorothy would want to rent out their third bedroom. Probably not, but – hm. _Interesting_.

“Political Science?”

“Business,” he sighed. “I nearly dropped out of school, actually, but father allowed me to transfer instead.”

Relena’s eyebrows raised. “That’s good,” she said, and Quatre nodded.

“Hey,” he said, without pretense. She’d forgotten how much she liked him. “What’re you doing tonight? Trowa is still working right now, but, any chance you’d want a repeat of the last time I was here?”

Her stomach…well, maybe she should eat, or, she just wasn’t prepared to think about it, or something. It twisted in itself, curling in a really unpleasant way.

“Um. Maybe? I should check in with Dorothy.”

“Of course,” Quatre said, too quick. “Oh god, of course! Honestly, no pressure. I just thought – well. Anyway.” He grinned. “You still have my number, yeah? Just let me know.”

Relena nodded, pitching her hands on her hips, wondering why her breathing had become ever so slightly more labored. It was only another few blocks to her building. “You know what, Quatre? I’d love to. Honestly, yes. Do you have anywhere to be right now? Dorothy and I were just going to start thinking about dinner.”

“Lead the way.”

It was foolish to think he wouldn’t be working, honestly. Her luck had never worked like that. But Quatre and Dorothy were getting along, and if Relena heard another single point about debate prep, she’d lose it, because her nerves about tomorrow were a tangle of worms low in her belly, exasperated by the concern that she’d have to see Heero again, outside of their very formal study session confines, and after the ridiculous handshake. 

The speech had gone well. It had been like riding a bike, almost, except the last time she’d been on the bike her dad had been alive. It had been _him_ giving her advice on word choice, on what tone to adopt at each part to...to make the biggest impact.

It was so _hard_ thinking about pursuing this path without him, honestly.

But – she had Dorothy. She had her family. And she had friends. She wouldn’t be alone.

She wouldn’t be alone.

Trowa was outside The Horny Badger waiting for them, chatting with the long-haired bouncer, accepting Quatre’s unabashed hug and kiss with ease when their group merged.

“We can go whenever you want,” Dorothy assured her, quietly, standing at her side. Relena nodded, but, she wanted to do this, honest. They were with an even larger group than before; Relena’s unofficial debate prep squad tagging along, probably to blow off the same amount of steam Relena wanted to get rid of.

And it was just...he was just...of course he was there. It was some cosmic joke of the universe that he was tending bar again, maybe, that he looked so good while doing it, and that she knew that he smelled so nice to boot.

Mercedita offered to get drinks once they were inside, and Brianne went with her. Relena felt Dorothy’s stare as she took off her own coat.

They found a booth that would accommodate all of them, and Alec grabbed checkers and plenty of popcorn. He set up a game with Trowa, and Brianne and Mercedita came back with beer.

“God, that bartender is _hot_ ,” Mercedita said, putting down the pitcher.

“Which one?” Alec asked, looking up. Trowa casually jumped four of his pieces.

“All of them,” Brianne continued, making Mercedita grin. “But the dark-haired one in particular.”

“Yes the one with the _eyes_.”

Relena didn’t want to look again.

“As soon as you want,” Dorothy repeated, out of the corner of her mouth.

Relena looked.

It took a moment for the bodies to make a path, for his head of hair to become obvious across the crowd.

“Oh yes,” Quatre said, and Relena could hear his grin. “That’s _Heero_ , isn’t it?”

“ _Heero_ , oh my gosh, he has a _name?_ And it’s not _adonis?_ ”

Brianne laughed.

Quatre smiled, coy. “Relena and him are – friends.”

Mercedita and Brianne turned in unison. “I’m sorry,” Mercedita started, “what?”

“We’re friends,” Relena offered, grabbing a glass, pouring herself a large beer. “Or we were. It’s been awhile. It’s in the past, anyway.”

She could hear them exchanging looks.

“Does it matter?” Relena asked, trying to laugh, the effort brittle. “Come on. He’s the _bartender_ , and we’re here to – well. What are we doing here?”

“It’s my birthday,” Alec offered, and Relena raised her glass.

“It’s _Alec’s birthday_ ,” she said, and she drank deeply from her glass.

The beer was cold and dark and tasted great, and it wasn’t too long before giggles came more readily, before Trowa was crowned the official champion of checkers and officially banned from playing because it was actually unfair, and another pitcher appeared at the table.

Relena stopped thinking about him, _definitely stopped looking at him_ , because she didn’t want to think about him, she wanted to eat popcorn and get to know the people at the table, and she established a fifty percent win streak at checkers.

“You guys want anything?”

Relena had been laughing about something, when she heard it.

Her stomach clenched immediately.

Heero was making rounds, apparently. Or – well, she didn’t want to let herself – 

He was looking directly at her.

“Yeah, another pitcher of the seasonal ale?” Mercedita asked, brave. Brianne fell all over her arm, losing it, a bit. Her face had been bright pink for awhile, now.

Whether or not Heero heard her…

She was too tipsy for this. She was too tipsy for this. Heero looked _amazing_. Tight white shirt, the sleeves slightly rolled. Black jeans. His arms were so muscled, so…

“Yeah, another pitcher,” Relena agreed, sitting up a bit. She wet her lips. “Hi,” she added, and she wondered vaguely if everyone else was watching them.

Heero was holding her stare.

“Good speech,” he said, and Relena’s entire torso warmed. So he was there.

“Thanks,” she said, staring back. “Um. Debates are tomorrow.”

“Boo,” Mercedita and Brianne booed, as had become the official response whenever someone mentioned them, per request.

Heero’s eyes lit up.

“I’m sure you’ll do great,” he said, and Relena felt the urge to lean forward and grab him.

“Thanks,” she said again.

Heero seemed to remember everyone else at the table. “I’ll uh, I’ll go get your pitcher,” he said, and with a final glance at Relena, he left.

She felt their eyes, before she acknowledged them.

“It’s nothing,” she said, shrugging, and she picked up her glass. “It’s over, anyway.”

“I’m not so sure that it is,” Mercedita said, grinning wildly.

Relena glanced at Dorothy, who showed absolutely no reaction. Relena played with her mostly empty glass. “No, it’s over. Who wants to play darts? Let’s play darts.”

The group agreed, shuffling into movement.

“It’s over?” Quatre was asking, in her ear, and Relena cut a glance at Dorothy. “Okay. There’s something I don’t know.”

Dorothy’s back was turned, but she was still, too still.

“Yeah, it’s over,” Relena said, flippant. “It was – it was short to begin with.”

“Hm,” Quatre said, looking over Relena’s head. Relena followed his stare, found Heero with a soft sort of grin.

He was talking to the girl, the other bartender girl. She was teasing him about something, probably, because – the soft little grin; the same one he’d left their table with. He was filling their pitcher with beer, and suddenly, Relena definitely didn’t want to be there when he got back with it. She saw Dorothy turn her head, as if Relena had telepathed the idea that she was also considering leaving.

No. _No_ , it was fine, it was Alec’s birthday, and she didn’t want to go home yet, she didn’t want to go home and face the work she had to do.

Relena turned away from looking at Heero, and found Dorothy watching her.

“It’s fine,” she told her friend, scooching farther off the bench. “Honest, it is. I want to play darts.”

And Relena made sure she was throwing, when Heero dropped off the beer, the extra glasses. He dropped them off too close to her, she was sure there were other surfaces, but she made an effort not to turn around.

“Hey I’m next,” Alec said, and it broke off some of the tension.

“What happened?”

Quatre and Relena were sitting together later, well past tipsy, definitely not driving home. Relena shrugged.

“Got busy,” she said. “School needed to take priority.” Why weren’t they just going to a different bar? It didn’t matter.

“Hm,” Quatre said again, and Relena turned to look at him.

“What does that mean? Hm?”

He looked at her for a moment. Then he looked at Trowa, who was playing against Dorothy, trying to give her pointers, unintentionally driving her insane.

“I dunno. With Trowa – I just – he was just – “ Quatre took a shuddery breath. “He was just _better_ than school. Than real life, than… _anything_.” He looked back at her. “I nearly flunked out at my old school. Trowa told me to cut it out, to stop coming back to visit so often, but I just…I dunno. I just…didn’t care so much, about everything else.”

Relena remembered the feeling. Kind of. She got a B on the –

“Well,” Relena said, taking a sip of her beer. “Maybe what you have is more special than what we had. It barely lasted three weeks, Quatre, honest.”

He shrugged. “I’ve actually known Heero for awhile. He’s friends with Trowa, and a few months ago I started insisting that Trowa introduce me to his friends. Turns out,” a soft smile spread across his face, “there were only two of them.” Quatre looked at her again. “We spent a good amount of time with Heero over the summer. He – well, he doesn’t date, so far as I could tell. Never talked about any exes, that’s for certain, barely seemed to show any casual interest in anyone, whenever we were out. Trowa told me not to bother trying to set him up with anyone.”

Relena frowned, trying to match that with what she knew of their very brief courtship. The Heero she knew – warm, engaged; such a strange mix of brash and cautious – she couldn’t picture it. They never really got to the point of talking about ex-whatevers, and now she wondered why.

“I kind of figured he was sort of on the ace spectrum, or something, until…until the last time we were here, actually.”

The memories flowed through her mind then, as she watched Heero going about his work on the other side of the bar. That was…what, two months ago? No, not even that long. She could barely make sense of it all, how things had happened, how they hadn’t, how it had…goodness.

Her eyes shifted to Dorothy, still in her line of sight. She was turning around, just to check on her, probably, and she saw Relena’s expression, the tight, strained one that came with too many thoughts and feelings. Relena took a sip of her beer, turning to Quatre, trying to convey that Dorothy didn’t need to come over.

“Well. Invite us both to your wedding, then. Maybe the timing will be better then.”

“It’s never a problem of timing,” Quatre said, and he sounded so _confident_ when he said it. “It’s a problem of how you’re willing to make it work.”

Relena’s hand tightened on the glass, and she stared at Quatre, processing his words. Was he right? No. No, really, Dorothy had said – _what had she said?_ That – Heero was bad for her. And it was true she’d abandoned her studies.

But – was that really a Heero problem? Or was he the excuse? She’d done the most work when they were together, honestly. And maybe it was just the timing, like she’d said, but, more that she had been looking for a way out for years, and Heero had been the most obvious way to do it. Maybe. Maybe that was a lie she was telling herself; maybe she was wrong. She glanced back at Heero, who just so happened to be at that moment helping a very pretty customer, having to turn his head so he could hear her order better.

Jealousy sparked inside of her, bitter and cold. Relena’s lips tightened. Was Quatre right? Was – was Dorothy? Ugh, it was too confusing.

“It doesn’t really seem _over_ , at all,” Quatre mused, the second person to say so since they got there, and Relena inhaled a shaky breath.

She glanced again at Dorothy, who was still playing darts with Trowa, her back turned. She shouldn’t. She really _shouldn’t._

“I’m going to get another pitcher,” Relena said, and she stood up, so she missed Quatre’s bright smile, the one that turned slightly smug, as he turned to watch Trowa patiently explain the aerodynamics of a dart to Dorothy again.

What was she doing? It couldn’t go anywhere. He wasn’t on Dorothy’s list, and, the list had a purpose, surely, because Dorothy had been right – it would be foolish to throw away the power of her potential romantic life on someone who tended bar for his friend as a favor. He was probably not excellent First Gentleman material, or whatever.

Oh god.

 _What are you doing_.

She found a gap at the bar, picking up a coaster, running its edges through her fingers out of an excess of nerves. The pretty girl bartender saw her and ignored her, and then Heero saw her, and he literally stopped what he was doing and walked right over.

“Hey,” he said, and her stomach warmed and knotted. How drunk _was she?_ Sober Relena wouldn’t be so brave, probably.

“Hey,” she answered, attempting part of a smile.

“Something else?” he asked, after a moment, because Relena hadn’t said anything.

“Oh, right. Another pitcher I think?”

“Same stuff?”

“Yeah. Or actually – wait. No, that’s fine. Alec is asleep, so I don’t think he’s drinking.”

“Tell him I said happy birthday.”

Relena nodded. “Were you really at my speech?”

She didn’t like the way her insides clenched, at the question she so awkwardly blurted, how they relaxed at the slow smile that spread over his lips.

“Yeah,” he said, and Relena felt her shoulders relax.

She wondered if it was worth telling him about how intimidated she’d been beforehand. How relieved she’d been when she started speaking. How proud she was of the way it had turned out.

“Thank you for the pen,” she said instead, and Heero’s lips closed over his smile.

“No problem,” he said, and his voice was low, and she could still hear it.

“When are you…” this she shouldn’t ask. She shouldn’t ask it at all. “When are you done,” she finally said.

Heero’s eyes were glittering, somehow.

“Soon,” he said, and Relena probably would’ve benefitted from a chair.

She nodded. “Great,” she said. “I think we’re – we’re probably almost done too. Have class in the morning, and everything.”

Heero nodded, and his tongue darted out to wet his lips. She hated that she noticed.

“Well, thanks for the pen, and, thanks for the ride, and the help and – everything.”

Was this babbling? This felt like babbling.

“Anyway, I should – I should probably get back to them.”

Heero nodded.

“I’ll bring you your beer,” he said, and Relena had to pause, because, she’d totally forgotten about it.

She returned to the booth, and Quatre was laughing into his glass.

“Oh hush,” Relena moaned, sinking down beside him. “I deserve so much popcorn for doing that.”

“I’m not saying you’re wrong,” he said. “I’m just relieved I didn’t have to listen to it. It looked like you were going to shake his _hand_ , or something. Good thing he’s still so wildly into you.”

She chose not to tell him of the time very recently when she did, in fact, shake his hand. She liked Quatre.

“Let me beat you in darts,” she begged.

“I’m probably the only person you could,” he countered, politely not laughing at her again, and they stood. Trowa turned when he saw them approaching. “Relena got us another pitcher,” he explained, and Trowa reached out an arm for him, tugging him close.

“I was kind of thinking about going home soon,” he said, into Quatre’s hair. Relena turned away, feeling a bit like a voyeur as Quatre bloomed under his affections. Dorothy was glaring past her, having none of the same reservations.

“You wanna play?” Relena asked her instead, waiting for Dorothy to look back. “I’ve got another few games in me.”

Dorothy met her stare. “Yeah,” she said, and she stood up straighter. “Fine. Let’s play.”

She handed Relena a small handful of darts, and then Relena stilled, freezing in motion, as Heero brought by the beer and dropped it off close again. They made eye contact over the thick plastic pitcher, and she swore she heard Mercedita whistle, except, Mercedita and Brianne had left together twenty minutes ago.

“It’s your turn,” Dorothy said, cutting in, and Relena knew her cheeks were warmer.

“Yes, I know,” she said, and she turned to the board and threw wildly. Her dart hit the board, but not with the needle, so it popped back immediately and clattered to the ground. Dorothy took up a position that looked much more professional.

“I don’t even know why you’re playing,” she said, aiming. “You hate darts.”

“I’m just bad at darts. Everyone else likes darts.”

“You don’t have to do it just because everyone else likes it,” Dorothy argued, and she threw a near-perfect bullseye. Maybe Trowa’s tips had been helpful, then.

Relena looked over her shoulder and saw Quatre and Trowa murmuring to each other.

“I don’t know why I didn’t think he’d be here,” Relena admitted, quiet, for Dorothy alone.

“It’s fine.”

Relena realized it was her turn. Her lungs felt tight, as she turned and stared at the board, rotating her arm through some practice throws.

“We’ve – “ she really didn’t want to say this. “We’ve been – “ _just don’t, go to your grave with it_ , “ – we’ve been, well, studying together.” She released the dart, and it flew, and sunk into the board’s outer ring.

Relena braced herself, and turned to her friend. Would she be mad? Would she be _extra mad?_ Prepared for the worst, Relena almost didn’t recognize the total look of apathy on Dorothy’s face. She almost looked… _bored_ , or something.

“I know.”

Relena balked. “You _know?_ ”

“I’ve known the whole time,” Dorothy said, flipping hair over her shoulder. She eyed the beer, but apparently decided she didn’t want any. “You were studying. What do I care.”

“But – “ Relena didn’t know what to say. “But – you told me to stay away!”

Dorothy leaned back on the partition between alleys, set up so rogue darts wouldn’t hit other patrons.

“Which you didn’t,” she said, and Relena’s shoulders sunk a bit.

“I know. I’m sorry. It was – it was purely platonic, promise.”

Dorothy looked away, her long neck stretching so she could see Heero behind the bar, probably.

Relena shifted her weight. She followed Dorothy’s stare. It _was_ platonic, but, maybe she definitely didn’t _want_ it to be. 

Oh, there it was. Weeks of careful planning, protections, preparation...all of it wasted under false pretense. She _wanted_ to see more of Heero. She really did, Dorothy’s warnings or no. 

She wanted to know him so much better. She wanted Dorothy to be okay with her knowing him so much better. Especially when he did things like reach up to pull the name of a beer off the board and his whole body went long and muscular with effort; they were out of _Fish in a Barrel IPA_ , apparently. Ugh.

Dorothy let out a blustery breath.

“Oh fine,” she said, and Relena did not at all understand her meaning.

“What?”

“Just – _fine._ ”

Relena stared at her, at her friend, waiting until Dorothy turned back around and met her stare.

“Just – don’t be late for class, tomorrow,” she said, warningly, and Relena’s heart was beating faster, because, she thought she understood, and she definitely wasn’t sure if she actually did, or if she was far drunker than she thought (because surely she was still drunk) and if what she was understanding was that Dorothy was giving her blessing to be more than platonic with bartender Heero.

“You’re sure?” Relena asked, breathless, hands full of darts.

“ _Yes_ , I’m sure,” Dorothy answered. “Like I said, just don’t be late.”

Relena could not at _all_ help the smile that broke across her face. It wasn’t even shy, it wasn’t even reserved. Maybe she was definitely drunk. Oh goodness.

Relena leaned forward and shoved all the darts into Dorothy’s hand, and she totally missed the mocking smile Dorothy had, because Relena was turning away, and skipping for the bar. This was so stupid. This was so absurdly stupid.

Sudden movement in any crowded place was sure to draw attention, but Relena really wasn’t thinking. She wasn’t thinking, as she saw Heero on the other side of the bar, as she saw him see _her_ , and see her heading toward him, as he put down the glass he was wiping.

And Relena didn’t even give him any warning, as she pushed herself up onto the bar, some ridiculously coordinated move born of a childhood obsession with ballet, maybe, because she pushed herself up onto it, and then she reached for his shirt, and she barely had to pull it toward herself, before she pressed their lips together.

It wasn’t until they were kissing that she realized how wildly inappropriate it was. How crowded and public this was, that this place was called _The Horny Badger_ , of all things, and she was kissing the bartender, without even checking to see if he actually _wanted to be kissed_ , and –

What was she doing.

Relena leaned back, her fingers still on his shirt, the warmth of his lips still tingling on hers.

She tried to gauge his expression, his dark eyes darting between hers, not pulling away from her, not even a little.

“You wanna get out of here?” she murmured, and Heero looked at her mouth again.

“Yeah,” he said, and she saw his hands move, because there’d been some sort of towel shoved into the back pocket of his jeans, and now there probably wasn’t. “Yeah,” he said again, smiling, and warmth spread all over Relena’s skin.

Relena wasn’t even late the next day, which was the best Dorothy could have hoped for, probably. And she wasn’t covered in hickeys, so, she probably should send Heero Yuy a gift basket, or something.

Ugh. Heero Yuy. Of all people, her friend had fallen in love with a bartender.

Well, a _top of his class_ bartender, with an undergraduate degree from a school Relena couldn’t even get into, who apparently had a trust fund at the very same bank Dorothy did, so.

Hm.

Dorothy was standing in the back of the auditorium again, as they were setting up for the debate, when the door opened – again.

This time, Heero knew to expect her.

Dorothy tilted up her chin.

“Surprised she made it.”

Heero’s eyes were still glowing (ugh), _eager_ , almost, but his lips stretched into the tiniest little smirk.

“We knew it was important.”

Dorothy rolled her eyes. These idiots.

“Not really. Honestly, my internal polling show that this whole thing is going to be one big joke. They should just have the election now. Relena’s going to win.”

Heero nodded, taking a position next to her. “It’s good practice, probably.”

“Good practice? Good practice would be debating someone actually intelligent. Chad and Brad are just going to embarrass themselves, and they’ll make Relena look worse because she will be so obviously smarter than them.”

Heero’s smirk spread. “She knows what she’s doing.”

Dorothy’s lips flattened. “Hm.”

The lights dimmed, slightly, in the rest of the room, as the same TA from before called the candidates to the front of the room, reviewing the rules. ‘Everyone gets an opening statement, keep responses to 30-seconds, get approval if there was something you’d like to respond to personally,’ etc. Dorothy had made sure the rules were appropriate, enforceable. A few late afternoon meetings to the TA’s office had done enough.

“She looks good,” Dorothy said this time, and Heero grunted. _Good_. Relena looked better than good. They’d gone with burgundy today, which made her look older. More professional, somehow. She was settling in at the podium they’d given her, reviewing her notes, and – she looked…relaxed. Confident. _Happy_. This was going to be…some debate, probably. A smirk spread over Dorothy’s teeth.

She almost felt _bad_ for Chad and Brad. Almost.

“She’s going to be Secretary of State one day, you know.”

Heero raised his eyebrow at her.

“I know.”

“Do you even know who her father is? Was?” Dorothy amended, looking at Heero.

Heero took a breath.

“I didn’t…at first.”

“But then you did.”

“And then I did.”

She didn’t have to work too hard to read between the lines.

“Well. He’d be proud of her,” Dorothy sighed, and she turned to face front once again.

It was the final test of the audio equipment, the TA was taking his spot as moderator, starting to shush the crowd.

Again Dorothy wondered about Heero’s presence at her side. She’d, well. She’s been subjected to Relena’s moon eyes all last evening, she figured she was about to be subjected to many more. Ugh. Dorothy just hoped that — well she certainly wouldn’t stand for —

“I just hope you understand what your role will be, moving forward.”

He turned slightly in her direction, arms crossed over his chest. “My role,” he echoed.

Dorothy shrugged hair over her shoulder. “Of course. In her eventual campaign, her eventual cabinet, her eventual career.”

He wasn’t contradicting her. When she turned to face him fully, he was grinning, even; a tiny little _smirk_. Dorothy narrowed her eyes.

“Well I don’t want you thinking that just because you’re fucking that you suddenly get _any_ decision making capabilities.”

He was still grinning, a little. “Message received.”

“Well just so we’re clear.”

“Well I think I understand.”

“Well _I’m_ going to be chief of staff.”

“Well _I’m_ going to be fucking her.”

Dorothy glared. It occurred to her that maybe she couldn’t tell what pissed her off more: that Relena really liked him, or that Dorothy was starting to like him. Whatever.

Heero’s grin was still shining, as the lights flickered and dimmed, as Chad or Brad prepared to make his opening statement. Heero was biting his lower lip, staring down at Relena, as if he was honestly thinking about how he couldn’t believe his good fortune.

Dorothy rolled her eyes again, only because she knew she could get away with it.

Idiots, honestly. The two of them.

They were so, so lucky to have her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair Wayne Bryant was recently paroled (as in, like, October) but there are countless cases like his that NPR has not reported on. Hoping for a better world moving forward, and as it bears repeating every day: Black lives matter.


End file.
